Karma Is A Pain
by Haunani
Summary: First, Elliot found out Leo read Ero. He could sort of live with that. Until that led to him finding some really embarassing fanfics of him, Leo and god almost everyone he knew online. NOT OKAY. And to think this all started with Holy Knight...
1. Enlightenment

**Chapter 1: Enlightenment  
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AN: Summary says it all. Because, just imagine Elliot's epic reaction if he ever found out what we fangirls write about him being a couple with *insert random character here-cough cough Leo* and other wonderful things. XD …This is sort of AU-ish? Since there's no way that Elliot could really discover fanfics about him and the rest of the Pandora Hearts characters online and the book Holy Knight does not exist in real life.

Disclaimer: I do not own Pandora Hearts.

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><p>"I can't believe they're giving us even more homework Leo," Elliot grumbled to the noirette walking next to him. The last class for the day had just finished, and he and Leo were heading straight back to their room. Normally when lessons were over, they would head to the library and Elliot would spend the rest of the afternoon reading the latest volume of Holy Knight, or they would go and practice Lacie on one of the school's pianos. Unfortunately, those happy days had just gone flying out of the window, since in addition to their homework load being doubled due to the approaching exams, Lutwidge Academy had also issued laptops to all their students for research for a project. "I mean come on, you're practically a genius Leo, so you'll be fine, but how am I supposed to finish all this and have time to read Holy Knight, right Leo? Leo? Leo! Are you even listening to me at all?"Turning his head to glare at Leo, Elliot gaped and almost lost his grip on the pile of homework he had in his arms when he caught sight of what the noirette was reading.<p>

"Leo! What the heck are you reading?" Elliot's head made an audible cracking noise as he snapped his head back as fast as he could and surveyed the corridor, making sure no one was near enough to see what the noirette was reading.

"What's wrong Elliot?" Leo asked, seemingly unaffected by the noble's outburst.

"What's wrong? What's wrong with _you_? You're reading-you're reading- you're reading PORN for goodness's sake! And the pictures were of two guys-two guys-" Elliot sputtered indignantly, his face burning as he tried desperately to erase the last thirty seconds of his memory.

_Don't think about it don't think about it don't think about it don't think about it-_

"So what if I am Elliot?" Leo looked up from his book to see the amusing sight of the noble whose face had turned was entirely red from mortification. The noirette's lips quirked up into a slight smirk as he added slyly (with several flowers and some sparkles popping into existence above his head as he said it) "Huh, don't tell me you want to read it as well Elly~ I never knew you were that type~"

If it was even possible, Elliot's face turned redder. Sputtering indignantly, it was a few seconds before he could find his voice to yell at Leo, "NO WAY YOU CREEP! AND DON'T CALL ME ELLY!" cursing inwardly as the noirette seemed even more amused by his actions.

With that Elliot sped on, juggling his laptop awkwardly on the stack of homework he was carrying perilously, thinking only to get away from Leo and his embarrassing questions. Shaking his head, Leo returned to reading his 'book'. _Ah,_ _Elliot is such a great target to tease since he gets flustered so easily_~

Reaching the safety of his room, Elliot retreated to lying on his bed, deciding to attempt to finish some of his homework before switching on the laptop to make a start on the project. Making a point of ignoring Leo when the noirette entered the room and sat on his usual spot on the floor continuing to read the Ero book from before (Elliot had long ago given up yelling at Leo to clear his bed, which since the day they had arrived here had been covered in books), Elliot instead sweated it out doing the algebra sums that their Maths teacher had given them. Normally when this happened, he would attempt to do it by himself, cursing most of the time and refusing any help from the noirette, until the noirette threatened him to shut up or die if he did not let Leo help him. For the time being however, he could not even look at Leo without the extremely disturbing images from earlier pop into his head.

After spending two hours and only succeeding in doing one pitiful page, (his temper was not improved by the fact that he was sure Leo was smirking at his inability out of the corner of his eye) Elliot gave up and decided to switch on the laptop. As he had never used one before, he briefed through the instruction manual, and feeling like a total idiot, gingerly pressed the power button, waiting for it to boot up. When it had fully loaded, Elliot awkwardly used the mouse to click on the Mozilla Firefox button and remembering that his teacher had said that the website Google was very useful for research, he typed it into the search bar, relaxing slightly when the Google picture appeared. _This isn't so bad after all. Now, what was the assignment about again? Oh yeah, I have to research on the history of Italy's crops and their prices from two hundred years ago. Honestly, who cares about what happened two hundred years ago? _Elliot's eyes widened as he clicked the enter button, listing 743,239 results for Italy. Clicking on one of the more promising links and after awhile finding what he wanted, he opened up a Word document and saved it. He could edit the project later with Leo.

_Huh, that was actually easy for once. And it's only 6pm. That means I'll have enough time to go to the library to read Holy Knight before dinnertime._

Elliot was just about to switch off the laptop when a 'brilliant' idea hit him. _Huh, I wonder, if I can research stuff that happened two hundred years ago on Google, can I research when the next book of Holy Knight is going to come out? Since the current book ended on such a cliff hanger with Edwin in such a precarious position…_

Elliot hastily typed Holy Knight in the search box, feeling triumphant as 168,594 results for Holy Knight popped up. To his delight, the first link was the official website of Holy Knight. He was just about to click on it when the link below caught his eye. It read:

_Well, I finished reading all twenty-one volumes of Holy Knight and I can see why our dear Elly likes it so much. I still like Edgar better than Edwin though. But enough of that, I've uploaded chapter five of my fanfic of Elly and his adorable servant Leo onto ! I made it as long and smutty as I could as well~ The link is located below._

_How the heck does this girl _(obviously it's a girl since she likes Edgar_) know my and Leo's name? Leo? ADORABLE? And what did she mean by smut?_

Glancing at Leo who had not moved from his spot on the floor, and feeling slightly apprehensive, Elliot clicked the link, curiosity overpowering the urge to check Holy Knight. The noble wondered who the hell this person was. Were there people _stalking_ him and Leo? Put that aside for now, what was _smut_ anyway? And how come everyone except him preferred Edwin to Edgar? Immediately the words that got his attention were this:

_Before Leo could say a word, Elliot kissed him roughly, easily pinning Leo on the bed, using one hand yanking on Leo's hair, while the other one firmly held the noirette in place. _

_What. The. Hell? Me and Leo K-Ki-KISSING? _(Elliot could feel the blood rushing up to his head again.) _I-I would never do that to Leo! I don't like him that way! …At least… I've never thought about him like that. Even if I DID, Leo would beat me to a pulp. So, there's absolutely no need to think about it. No need at all. Case closed. And I don't think 'beautiful' is a word that can be used to describe any guy. …But, Leo's eyes are very unique... _Facepalming, Elliot sighed, cursing himself._ For goodness sake, you would think that your own stupid mind would take sides with you. _

Sneaking another glance at Leo and knowing he would regret this, Elliot used the mouse to scroll down the page. _It's um… very detailed…I can't believe I'm actually reading this… But seriously what kind of messed up person writes this kind of stuff? This is almost as bad as Leo's Ero..._

(Key word: Almost.)

_AHEM. No I did not just think that, and I am most definitely NOT getting a nosebleed. Zilch. Nada. Zip._

And then he scrolled down some more.

It took some seconds for the words he was reading to sink into his stupefied brain and then-

_Ohmygodohmyfrigginggod arghhhhh-_

Leo jerked his head at the noise Elliot made, a sound that sounded like a cross between a choke and a gasp, as the noble jumped off the bed as though he had been electrocuted, staring as Elliot slammed the laptop shut and threw it across the room, where it collided with a bookshelf and dropped to the floor with a loud thud. _What the-why the hell did Elliot throw his laptop across the room? And why is his face so red? He looks exactly like he did earlier when he saw me reading Ero…_

"Is something wrong, Elliot?" Leo said, raising an eyebrow at the noble's facial expression. _…His nose is bleeding..?_

"NO! I mean n-nothing's wr-wrong! Nothing at all! I-I-I just remembered I left something very important in the classroom! I have to go and get it now!" Elliot then proceeded to rush out of the room holding a hand to his face which felt like it was flaming, feeling as though everyone (Leo) could see the perverted images that were broadcasting in his mind, leaving a much mystified Leo behind.

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><p>AN: I couldn't resist adding in the scene where Leo is reading Ero since that omake is my 2nd favourite Pandora Hearts omake. X3 (First is the one where Elliot smiles as he plays with Ada's cats) I hope you enjoyed reading this first chapter.<p>


	2. The Joy of Pairings

**Chapter Two: The Joy of Pairings**

AN:This might seem to be a bit rushed because I decided it would be a good idea to update before I no longer have internet access for awhile. =_= Much thanks to those who reviewed my last chapter!

Warning: OOC Elliot(?)

Disclaimer: I do not own Pandora Hearts.

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><p>It seemed to Elliot, ever since <em>that<em> disturbing day(which was actually two days ago), he was under some kind of fucking curse. Ignore the fact that he sounded like some kind of bitchy teenage girl moaning over her life, he actually had some very good reasons for thinking so.

Reason One: Engaging in any activity with Leo now was extremely awkward to say the least. He could not even look in the general direction of Leo's face without feeling his face heat up. If he had to talk to the noirette, he usually focused at whatever was behind the noirette's shoulder and mumbled/stuttered his way through.

Reason Two: He had the distinct feeling that he was now being _stalked all the time_. For goodness sake, he had only read _one_ –Elliot shuddered at the thought- of those fanfics. Who knew how many more of those fanfics were out there that had been written by people with perverted minds? Hell, they probably even watched him and Leo when they were both _sleeping_.

Reason Three: Ever since Elliot had gotten back to his room, he had been bombarded by questions from Leo, which he half-heartedly fended off and then finally had escaped by saying he was tired and wanted to go to bed. Unfortunately, Leo refused to let whatever was disturbing the noble go, and Elliot was sure that the noirette was constantly watching him like a hawk underneath his thick glasses. Whenever Elliot pointed this out to him (albeit mumbling), Leo just said that he was reading a book. _Sheesh, what was Leo, his mother?_

Reason Four: He could now not read Holy Knight without being reminded of you-know-what. That was practically a blasphemy, stopping him from reading Holy Knight.

But all that practically paled in the face of the largest reason. He could more or less deal with the rest (sort of) but what was worst of all, he was pretty sure under everything else, under all the shock and embarrassment, he had…sort of… maybe_..._just a little bit… _liked_ reading the fanfic. _Liked. Reading. It. _Groaning, Elliot pressed his face into the bed, wondering whether he should just take the easy way out and suffocate himself. Damnit, he was not gay! Not gay at all, and especially not for his own damned _servant_. If Elliot did not know any better, he would have sworn someone was sadistically enjoying his misery.

"Elliot, are you done daydreaming?" Jerking back to reality, Elliot looked up to see Leo standing beside him with a neutral expression on the noirette's face. "What do you want Leo?" Elliot asked warily, scanning the noirette's face for some kind of clue. _Don't think about anything __**at all**__._

"It talks," came the dry response, earning a scowl from Elliot and causing him to repeat his last question. "I was thinking that we ought to go over the project since we have to hand it in next week."

_Oh shit. _"…How should I put this? No way. No way in hell."

"And why not?" Casting around for a reason, Elliot could come up with nothing more original than "I just don't feel like doing it now."

This turned out to be the wrong thing to say, as Leo twitched, not bothering to disguise his annoyance at the noble and the increasing desire to punch the noble in the face. "You've been acting strangely since ever since you used your laptop," Leo said slowly, alert for any kind of reaction from the noble. _Score. _Elliot's slate blue eyes widened, and his mouth opened for a second before shutting it with a snap.

"Wh-what makes you think there is something wrong with me?"

Leo frowned, apparently thinking about the noble's question. "Hmm, let me see. You've been barely talking to me of late-wait scratch that, you haven't been arguing with me lately, you stutter and turn red most uncharacteristically when you have no choice to talk to me," Leo said, ticking off his fingers as he went, ignoring the glowers he was receiving from Elliot. "You have not touched any volumes of Holy Knight since three days ago when you normally can't shut up about the glory of Edwin's victories and how badly Edgar does in comparison, you keep looking over your shoulder as though somebody is constantly watching you and you seem to be distracted most of the time." Leo paused, trying to judge the noble's reaction. Elliot's face, which he could normally read like a book, remained stony.

"There's nothing wrong with me!"

_Ah. _Now,that sounded more like his master, Elliot Nightray. "If there's nothing wrong with you, quit acting like a spoiled brat and do the project on the laptop with me."

"That thing is _evil_." Elliot dead-panned, warily watching the laptop as though it was a bomb about to go off.

"Now you're just acting ridiculous." Leo said, rolling his eyes at the noble's immatureness. Seeing that the noble was still unconvinced he added rather pointedly, "Do you want to fail the class? It counts for seventy-five percent you know. And it would be such a _disgrace_ for the Nightray Family's honour to have one of their heirs _fail_ something even if it's just a school class and even though I'm sure your family can hush it up, your father would not be happy."

_Geez, did Leo have to sound as though he had committed murder or something drastic like that? It's only a stupid project. …But he might have a point. After all he was a Nightray, and Nightrays weren't afraid of anything, including…what's the right way to describe it… disturbing words._

"…Fine then. But I'm not going anywhere near Mozilla Firefox or Google." With that, Elliot reached for the laptop, reluctantly surrendering himself to his fate. Leo nodded happily, sitting next to Elliot on the bed, going back to the helpful servant pose. The noirette could not help a smirk creep onto his face though._ There's something wrong with Elliot. And I'm going to find out what it is._

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><p>It was late in the evening by the time they had finished. Leo had gone to the library, saying he wanted to borrow some more books, to add to the never ending pile on his bed. Elliot had seen no point in going with him since he could not borrow Holy Knight. He was now spending his time glancing at the laptop that was sitting innocently on his desk. …<em>It couldn't hurt to take another look right? Just one quick look and I'll never go back to that site again.<em>

Feeling oddly relieved/ashamed at his decision, Elliot switched the laptop, drumming his fingers impatiently against the desk as he waited for it to load, clicking on Mozilla Firefox and then typing Holy Knight and googling it. Sure enough, the link was still there. Ignoring the part of his brain that was questioning his sanity(and sexuality at this point), he clicked on it, feeling nervousness coil like a snake in the pit of his stomach.

_I can't believe you're sinking this low. _The part of his brain that still had his common sense piped up. _What have I got to lose? _(It's not weird to argue with yourself, it's only weird if you lose.) _Your honour, your dignity, your pride and not to mention the fact that Leo will either laugh himself into a coma if he finds out or he will make your life as painful as he can imagine. Oh yeah? Well, you can bloody well stuff it-_

The page had loaded.

Sure enough, it was still there.

It was still as detailed as he remembered.

"_FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF_-"

-Five minutes later-

With his head repeatedly slamming against the wooden desk, Elliot wondered what was wrong with him. _I can't let Leo see this anyway…_

Opening his eyes, Elliot avoided looking at the center of the screen and was about to close the tab when he saw the bottom part of the screen had the word, 'Reviews'. _What the-people actually encourage other people to write this-this-_

Clicking on the hyperlink, he almost bit his tongue off from shock when he saw the reviews: _Great detail and very nosebleed worthy~ The smut was great and was not rushed and Elliot and Leo were in character. Great work for a PWP. Please keep up the good work! ...This-THIS-_

And then he saw something that chilled his blood.

Poll: What is your favourite PH Pairing? Note: It goes from Seme to Uke.

Thirty-four votes for OzxAlice

Twenty-eight votes for OzxGilbert/GilbertxOz

Twenty-two votes for _ElliotxLeo_

Eighteen votes for BreakxReim

Fourteen votes for BreakxSharon

Twelve votes for GlenxJack

Nine votes for VincentxGilbert

And so on.

'Mindfucked' (in more ways than one) would describe Elliot Nightray's current state of mind perfectly.

_THE XERXES BREAKXREIM__ LUNETTES?_

_HIS OLDER BROTHERXTHAT SHORTY OZ VESSALIUS?_

_VINCENTXGILBERT-ISN'T THAT INCEST SINCE THEY'RE BROTHERS? _

_I…I'm not going to ever be able to look them in the eye in future…_

Elliot scrolled down.

_And the comments. Oh dear god, the comments._

_OzxAlice is my favourite of them all-and it's practically canon!_

_BreakxSharon is so fluffly :D_

_ElliotxLeo is such an awesome master and servant relationship~_

_BreakxReim is so hot, there should be more fics of them._

_I love EllyLeo ::3_

_Do I even dare to know what does 'Seme' and 'Uke' mean...__I'll get away from this page and google it._

Elliot went to bed that night in a thoughtful (if quite disturbing) state of mind.


	3. The Threesome Join In

**Chapter 3: The Threesome Join In.  
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AN: Once again, thank you so much to those who reviewed! It means a lot to me that people are interested in reading this and hope you enjoy reading the following chapter, even though it's short. X'D

Disclaimer: I do not and will never own Pandora Hearts. Otherwise our innocent, golden boy Jack will never have turned out to be such a crazy psychopath. *sigh* Why is it always the pretty ones…

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><p>Two days had passed and Leo was no closer to discovering what Elliot was hiding from him. He was currently walking back from the library where he was spending most of his time after lessons were over, as Elliot seemed jumpy if Leo was even in the same fucking room as him. Leo sighed and rubbed his face with a hand. He was getting more and more frustrated as he had yet to think up a way to make Elliot cough up what was bothering him. Leo couldn't even remember the last time Elliot had successfully kept a secret from him this long. Normally if the noble had a problem and he couldn't think of a way to solve it, he would cave and tell the noirette, and endure some slight teasing from the noirette as the price to pay for getting a solution. But this time-nothing at all. "What the hell…" the noirette muttered, removing his hand and wondering whether to return to their room. Leo would never admit this out loud, but he was starting to miss his hot-tempered master, the frequent arguments that they got into and which Leo almost always won.<p>

"Leo! Wait up!" _That voice-Oz-kun?_ Turning around, the noirette saw Oz Vessalius running and then when he was a few paces from Leo, the blond stopped and panted slightly, trying to regain his breath.

"Hello, Oz-kun. What brings you to Lutwidge Academy? Are you here to see Ada-sama again?" Oz nodded, his smile dimming slightly. "We have no missions from Pandora for now, so I figured I might as well see Ada again, because Uncle Oscar wanted me to grill Ada on whom she likes. But maybe she sensed our intentions as when me, Gil and Alice-san arrived here, we found a note on her table that she was going to a party with her friends and wouldn't be back until tonight."

Leo peered behind Oz. There was no else in sight. "...So where is Gilbert-sama and Alice-san?" The blond shrugged. "I'm not sure. I think Alice said she smelt meat and wandered off. Gil went to search for her. Urrrgh, Gil's so irresponsible leaving his master alone! And until they get back I have nothing to do…"

_Maybe-_"…Oz-kun, can I ask you for a favour?" "Huh? Of course Leo!" "It's not really that important Oz-kun…it's just that Elliot's been acting a bit odd the last few days…and I was wondering whether you could help me find out what's bothering him so." The blond looked surprised at the noirette's statement. "Acting oddly? What do you mean by that?" "Well, a few days ago, we received an online project as homework from one of our classes. However, ever since Elliot first used the laptop, he started acting weirdly. I mean, for one thing, he now won't touch Holy Knight-" Nodding at the exclamation of shock from the blond, Leo continued with, "He doesn't even try and talk or argue with me, he turns red and stutters when he has no choice, also keeps looking behind him as though there's someone watching him constantly." Oz drew in a sharp breath, turning over the things that Leo had said to him. _This was an emergency. Elliot really did sound as though something was bothering him. Especially the fact that most of the time Elliot and Leo were almost always disagreeing with each other, as well as the fact he was not reading the glory that was Holy Knight…_ With a determined look in his bright emerald orbs, he stated, "This sounds serious Leo. I'll definitely help you." Leo smiled, pleased at getting the blond's help. "Ah, thank you very much Oz-kun." "…Um, so what's your plan, Leo-"

"WHY THE HELL DID YOU DRAG ME AWAY FROM MY MEAT SEAWEED HEAD!"

"SHUT UP YOU STUPID RABBIT! YOU'VE BEEN PIGGING OUT FOR THE LAST HOUR! WE NEED TO FIND OZ!" "I'LL FIND MY MANSERVANT BY MYSELF AFTER I'VE FINSHED EATING ALL OF MY MEAT!" "WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY YOURSELF STUPID RABBIT? HE'S MY MASTER!" "I ALREADY TOLD YOU HE'S MY MANSERVANT SEAWEED HEAD! DON'T THINK THAT I DON'T SEE THE WAY YOU LOOK AT HIM!" "WH-WHAT D-DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?"

_Huh, Gilbert looks extremely embarrassed…_

"HA! IT'S OBVIOUS YOU-"

"Eh…you guys could please not discuss this kind of thing here? The whole academy is going to hear you at this rate..." "O-Oz!" Ignoring the mutter (this is all your fault) from Alice, the raven immediately rushed over to the blond and the noirette. "Oz! Are you okay? Nothing's happened to you right?" "Relaxxxx Gil. Just because we've returned here doesn't mean the Baskervilles are going to pop out and ambush us. And I just got bored of waiting for you and Alice-san to return so I chatted with Leo-kun.~" Casting a 'you will pay for this' look at Alice, the raven seemed only to take the blond's word for it after he had looked Oz all over, earning a "STOP TOUCHING HIM LIKE THAT SEAWEED HEAD!" and a complaint from Oz. "But anyway, it's good that you've arrived for once at the right time! Leo-kun needs our help-"

Before the blond could continue, Alice who still looked extremely annoyed, interrupted with: "Hmph! Why should me and my manservant waste our time helping Shaggy Glasses!" She called me Shaggy Glasses… "Aww, don't act like that Alice-sannn. If you help me and Leo, I'll take you to a buffet at a restaurant~"

"…A buffet? What's that? It doesn't sound tasty like meat at all…"

"A buffet is a wonderful thing for Alice-san since Alice-san loves to eat meat so much~ At a buffet you can eat as much as you want~"

"HUH? As much as I want? That means Seaweed Head won't protest over how much meat I eat?"

Ignoring the "DON'T CALL ME SEAWEED HEAD!" from Gilbert, Oz nodded his head eagerly, seeing that Alice was almost convinced. "Anddd, you can stay there as long as you want~" By this time, Alice was all but drooling. "Meat! I'll do it!"

"Alright now that Alice-san has agreed to helping us, what do you plan to do Leo-"

"…Hey Oz…are you sure this is a good idea?" Gilbert asked worriedly. The raven immediately sweat-dropped and panicked as Oz turned to stare teary-eyed at him, the sparkles and Oz-cherubs that had been floating around his head vanishing back to where they came from. "Gil-"-sniff-"You-"-sniff-"Aren't in-interested in helping me and Leo..? "-sniff-"I'm so hurt…I might just-"The blond then proceeded to wiping his eyes with a handkerchief that had magically appeared, which caused Leo to stare amusedly at the scene, while in contrast Gilbert was sputtering in panic and Alice was apparently too lost in a daydream of eating meat to care about the blond...

"Oz-Oz! No I didn't mean-" At this point, the blond let out a sob and actually let a tear trickle down his cheek. -sniff-"Gil doesn't care for me anymore…"-sniff- "Of course I care for you Oz!" Realising what he had just said, the raven turned beet-red and doggedly continued on, adamant on finishing his sentence if it killed him. "I- mean as your servant you're my master and sure I'll help you and Leo-kun, but do you-"

Instantly the aura of misery that had been surrounding Oz disappeared, with the sparkles, Oz-cherubs and now flowers added to the mix coming back in full force, almost blinding the raven and the noirette. Oz-kun is quite the actor… "Yay! I knew I could count on you Gil!~" With that announcement, the noirette noticed a mischievous glint in the blond's emerald eyes. Much to Leo's surprise, Oz stood on his toes and with some difficulty from his short height, kissed the raven. _I never knew Oz-kun swung that way... _Luckily, Alice-san was oblivious to all in her daydream of meat, otherwise Leo would have bet that a fight to the death would begin. Spinning around to face Leo and totally ignoring the fact that the raven was currently frozen to his spot with his gold-coloured eyes becoming larger and larger as every second past (any moment now Leo expected Gilbert to faint) Oz immediately said, "Well, that settles it for sure! Me, Gil and Alice-san will help you find out what Elliot is being bothered by!"


	4. The Cat Is Out Of The Bag

**Chapter 4: The Cat Is Out Of The Bag.**

AN: …You know how I said in my last ending author's note that there will be about three or four more chapters to go before this story ends right? ...Yeah, that was before my plot bunny decided to go on a sugar high. Which means this fic will probably have a a few more chapters than planned. *gets shot* On another part, I love you all who have reviewed so far! (I'm repeating myself over and over, aren't I? Meh.) But seriously, I'm so happy to see people's comments on this story that I'm sure that I can become Oz for a day~

Disclaimer: I do not own Pandora Hearts.

(This takes place immediately after where the last chapter ended.)

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><p><em>This may not have been such a good idea after all. <em>Nodding uneasily at Oz's enthusiastic answer and unconsciously taking a step back, Leo was definitely sure he was going to regret asking Oz and his friends for help. Especially since that girl called Alice was _still_ daydreaming about meat, Gilbert was in paralytic shock from being kissed on the cheek by his master-_Really it's pathetic_- and Oz who by this time had extremely large sparkly shota-eyes and was watching Leo in a (how to put it?) _very_ creepy-and even -_oh my god a **fanboy**_- way.

Realising he had to say something, the noirette sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck and said, "Well, you see Oz-kun, I'm embarrassed to say I haven't actually thought up a plan to get Elliot to cough up what's bothering him. The only thing I can think up is to access his laptop and see whether I can find anything on it that may give me a clue. But in the meantime I need you to distract Elliot."

"Eh? Distract Elliot? Is that all? No problem Leo!" Clapping his hands together in glee at the thought of seeing (and messing around with Elliot again) Oz looked behind to find that Alice and Gilbert on the other hand were not paying attention at all.

"Alice! Gil! You two must pay attention you know~" When no response came, the blond let out a small sigh and looked at Alice pointedly, saying "Aliceeee, you must pay attention to what Leo was saying if you want to eat meat~"

That did the trick for the forever hungry rabbit. Alice went from daydreaming mode to alert in less than a second as soon as she heard the word 'meat'. Unfortunately, Gilbert was oblivious to all, and was in fact standing as still as a statue, barely breathing, with his eyes focused at nothing.

"Hey Gil, did you hear me?"

-The thought that keeps circling inside Gilbert's head: _Oz…he-he kissed-Oz kissed-I-He-_-

"Yoo-hoo, Gillll~" Oz said, waving his hand in front of the raven's face.

No response.

"Gil~"

Still no response.

"Gil talk to meee~"

At this point, Alice's patience snapped and she yelled, "OI SEAWEED HEAD! ARE YOU DEAF? HURRY UP AND REPLY TO MY MANSERVANT SO I CAN EAT MY MEAT!"

This miraculous effort failed to awaken the raven from whatever trance he was in.

Leo, who had been observing the three, sided up to Oz and whispered something in his ear. The blond nodded and Leo went up to the raven.

"Gilbert-sama, I am sorry to say to you that earlier, Oz-kun ate some sweets that had aphrodisiacs in them, was thus knocked out and kidnapped by Miss Echo to bring Oz to your brother who had planted them there, and is probably currently being held prisoner in Vincent-sama's room in Pandora and is being tortured by Vincent-sama as we speak."

_Three. Two. One._

"WHAT-OZ I'M COMING!" The raven jumped to his feet, oblivious to his surroundings were of Lutwidge Academy and not of Pandora, and would have dashed to the nearest exit, had not Oz stuck out his foot to trip the raven.

"Silly Gil~ I'm perfectly fine~"

"Hmph! It's about time you woke up, you useless Seaweed Head!" Alice scowled, looking down at the pathetic twitching heap on the floor which was the raven.

"Oz…You're okay…"

"Alright, now that Gil's fine, here's what we're going to do~"

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><p>Elliot was lying on his bed, with a book(not Holy Knight) over his head. Elliot was actually wishing that he had homework or at least something to do so his mind couldn't get distracted onto <em>that<em>. So when he had absolutely nothing else to do, he spent his time arguing with himself.

_For goodness sake, get a grip on yourself Elliot Nightray. This is normal behaviour for most teenager boys right? Just look at Leo, not only does he read those kind of things, he also looks at the pictures of people **doing** it._

Leo. _Leo._ Elliot couldn't remember really talking/arguing with the noirette for the last few days. In fact, they had barely talked to each other except for some awkward questions and responses since Elliot mostly avoided eye contact with the noirette. _…Crap, he must be really annoyed at me for ignoring him. I'm surprised he hasn't thrown something at me yet. Sorry Leo, but I just can't look at you in the eye after reading about me-goddamit! …But I can't just continue ignoring him…_

Sighing, the noble got to his feet, deciding to summon up his courage to go and find Leo and explain the reason why he had been ignoring the noirette. On the bright side, he felt relieved that he was finally going to explain what had been bothering him. This disappeared as soon as he realised that he had no idea how to put it to Leo.

"_Hey Leo, the reason I haven't been talking to you of late is that I've…"_

"_Leo, you see I found this website which has stories written by other people about me and you…"_

"_I'm sorry that I haven't talked to you a lot but I-y-you-see-…"_

_Fuck, this isn't working!_

_Alright, let me see, I think I have two choices:_

_One: Go to Leo, apologise no matter how embarrassingly it is, and wait for Leo to do whatever he chooses to do and suck it up._

_Two: Stay in this room and hope for divine intervention._

…_Screw it._

"Elliot, where are youuuu~"

NO_. NO. It can't be that shorty-NO! Calm down Elliot. It's just your stressed mind from all the homework you've been given and those disturbing **fanfics**. _Elliot felt a shiver go down his spine as he thought about the poll and some other fanfics he had glimpsed through._ That or you've finally snapped._

"Ellyyyyy~"

_Just. Let. Me. Drop. Dead. Right. Now._

"There you are, Elly~!"

…_If he comes too close I'll…_

Oz never saw it coming. One moment he was rushing to glomp Elliot, the next moment he found himself flat on the ground with the noble's foot firmly planted on his chest. This made it hard to breathe, not to mention the noble's ever-present sword _was barely_ _an inch away from hi_s _face._

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING HERE VESSALIUS!"

"Ah…Elly…remove your sword please…you're also making it hard…for me to breathe…"

"DON'T CALL ME ELLY DAMNIT!"

Glaring down at the blond, and pressing even harder with his foot on the blond's chest to emphasis his point, Elliot was just about to yell at the blond once more when ninga!Alice fly-kicked him out of the way causing Elliot to crash into the opposite wall of his and Leo's room that caused most of the books on the bookcases to fall out. Despite seeing little white cats with wings going round and round his head, the noble was unfortunately still conscious enough to hear that Alice girl bark out: "HOW DARE YOU LAY HANDS ON MY MEAT PROVIDER-I MEAN MY MANSERVANT WITHOUT MY PERMISSION!" followed by his older foster wimpy brother Gilbert call out "OZ?"

Groaning, Elliot got to his feet, cursing/thanking his lucky stars(if he even had one) that Leo hadn't seen him getting kicked by a girl. He'll never hear the end of it. Unfortunately he really didn't need to see Gilbert, Alice or Oz. _Crap._ Just _looking_ at them was enough to make him recall one of the most horrific fics he had seen briefly after he had gotten away from that-drumroll please-_pairings_ poll. The summary had had been like this: After some friendly advice from Break, Gil decides to take control for once aided by Break. Little does he know Alice is watching. PWP. Threesome. Yup, after reading the first few sentences he had to rush to the nearest paper basket to throw up. Just _thinking_ about it was making him nauseous.

_Especially the bit where Gilbert did **that **with his tongue-Oh shit, bin, where the hell is that stupid bin-_

The sound of retching distracted Oz and the rest as they looked in Elliot's direction, only to see him vomiting into a bin.

"Elliot are you okay?"

_I might be if that shorty and those stalkers who are always following him around wore paper bags over their heads._

Deciding not to voice that aloud, Elliot got up and wiped his mouth, a scowl appearing on his face as the blond was looking worriedly at him.

"Tch…never mind Vessalius…what are you doing here anyway? Are you visiting Ada Vessalius again? If so, why did you come to visit-LISTEN TO ME SHORTY!" came the infuriated yell when he saw that instead of listening to him, the blond was currently looking at his belongings.

"Elliot! Don't talk to Oz like that!"

"Meat…"

"Oooo, I didn't get to properly see your sword last time Elly~ It's so shiny~"

_! _

Elliot's face turned pale as he realised what Oz was touching-

"GET YOUR GRUBBY HANDS OFF MY SWORD SHORTY!"

"Touch touch touch touch-"

"YOU-"

Seeing the aura of menacing doom that was coming off the noble in waves, Oz decided this would be a good time to put 'Distract Elliot Away From His Room' plan into operation and start running-now.

"Oz wait!"

"COME BACK HERE!"

_Good luck Leo~ _

* * *

><p>After making sure Elliot was long gone<em>, <em>Leo entered the room and booted up Elliot's laptop. Unfortuantely, he was dismayed to see the 'please type in your password' box appear.

_Shoot. I didn't expect Elliot to have a password on his laptop. Now what am I going to do?_

…Leo then typed 'EdgarSucks' into the bow and pressed the Enter key. Sure enough, it said 'Welcome'.

_Yup, my respect for Elliot just dropped by fifty percent. _(Leo's respect for Elliot dropped to below zero when he saw that Elliot's desktop's wallpaper was of two tabby kittens playing with a ball of wool. _Honestly._)

Clicking on the Mozilla Firefox icon, Leo then proceeded to think up what next to do. Ears pricked up for any signs of Elliot returning, Leo checked the browser history. Besides Google, the only websites that Elliot had visited lately was something called 'Fanfiction Net-Pandora Hearts Archive'.

_Hmm…fan means you admire something while fiction means it's false. If you put them together it doesn't make any sense. Maybe he found something about Holy Knight? But I've more or less seen all the Holy Knight books that have been released and none of the volumes had any chapters called 'Pandora Hearts'. _

Leo clicked on the 'Restore Previous Session' the Pandora Hearts Archive appeared, but all Leo could see were words and titles of stories.

_Wait-why are me, Elliot's and Oz's names on some of them? There's also that man called Break that Elliot respects from Pandora and Sharon Rainsworth and so on. _Hell-almost everyone the noirette had heard of was here. Then a summary of a 'fanfiction' caught his eye. It read:

_Leo finally takes his teasing too far which causes Elliot to snap and decides to show him who's boss. M-rated._

…_What the hell do they mean by Elliot showing me who's boss?_

Leo clicked on the link, thus sealing his fate.

* * *

><p>"Oi, Oz!"<p>

"Yes Alice?"

"Why are we running away from that Shaggy Glasses's master?"

"Ah, Alice~ I explained the reason for that earlier: It's because we have to distract Elliot for awhile so that Leo have enough time to discover what's bothering him-"

"But that doesn't make sense-"

"Shut up you stupid rabbit! Oz, people are staring at us!"

The raven was correct. Indeed the gang were causing quite a commotion as they ran down Lutwidge's many corridors dodging and jumping over corners to stay ahead of Elliot. Students and teachers alike leapt out of the way to avoid being knocked down, their reactions either cheering them on or futilely commanding them to stop. The gang had no intention to stop however, with Elliot yelling bloody murder and many, many profanities at the top of his voice from somewhere behind them. As they ran past the photography club, the gang could hear cameras clicking and exclamations:

"Hey, aren't those the intruders from last time?"

"No way they can't be!"

"That raven haired man looks so dreamy~"

"I prefer the cute blond guy~!"

"He's so handsome~"

"That black haired girl looks awfully pissed…"

"Kyaaa~ He winked at me!"

"Oz concentrate!"

"But she was really cute-"

"Oz! Can I just knock Shaggy Glasses's master unconscious?"

"No you can't Alice!"

"Can you two settle this someplace quieter!"

"Well I'm not going to run anymore on an empty stomach!"

"Wait Alice what do you mean by that-_oof_-"

"You stupid rabbit what are you doing to Oz-!-"

-Two minutes later, because no matter how righteous annoyed you feel, it's hard to chase someone without being reminded of the perverted fanfiction you read about them-

_Damn, where did that shorty and the rest go? WHAT THE HELL WHY IS MY SWORD-_

And then everything went dark for Elliot Nightray.

* * *

><p>Leo was by this time was so entranced by the inventive use of chocolate that Elliot was using in the fanfic which he was reading, that he hardly registered the noises the gang made as they entered the room-which showed how distracted he was, as Alice was loudly complaining of being famished, Gilbert who was placing Elliot onto his bed and at the same time yelling at Alice for knocking him unconscious and Oz trying effortlessly to stop them.<p>

"Honestly you stupid rabbit, do you have any brain cells in your head that aren't occupied with meat-"

"Shut up Seaweed Head! I wasn't going to waste my time any longer-"

"You guys please stop already…"

"Don't butt in Oz!"

"How dare you talk to Oz that way stupid rabbit!"

"Seaweed Head!"

Shaking his head, Oz glanced at Leo's direction. Leo had not made a sound or greeted them when they had entered the room. Had he found out what was bothering Elliot? If so, why wasn't he-

"Oz-kun", the noirette began slowly, never taking his fascinated eyes off the screen and seemingly totally oblivious to the shouting row that was going on behind him. (Oz was actually quite amazed that security hadn't come bursting in yet to apprehend them) "Come over here. I've found out what's why Elliot's been so distracted lately."

Happily taking this advantage to bounce to Leo's side, Oz peered over Leo shoulder. There didn't seem to be anything major on the screen, no strange pictures or anything like that, just a lot of words-

_Leo let out a cross between a groan and a whimper as Elliot spread the chocolate over his sensitive chest, gasping for breath as one of Elliot's fingers pinched his hardened nipples a few times before slipping lower. The dick. He would really have to remember to give Elliot a hard punch on the head later on- _"_Ah! Elliot-you-_"

_…_

Oh. _Oh._

"You…! Elliot… I-this is…" Oz was struggling to form a coherent sentence, the tips of his ears burning as he stared at the words that were making Elliot do...

"This is just one of the fics Oz-kun, there are many with you and Gilbert-sama and Alice-san as well as well-pretty much everyone you and I know."

And the day, which had been going oh so well up until now, became stranger.

"There's _more_? Of me and Alice and Gil? _Really_?"

"Yes Oz-kun~" Leo said, a reluctant smile appearing on his face at how shocked Oz was. It was after all, _very_ interesting to think that people had been writing stories about him, Oz, Elliot and the rest of his friends.

_The only thing I don't really like is why is Elliot on top all the time…It's pissing me off to think that I'll ever be so submissive to Elliot._

"For example Oz-kun, there are many fics of you and Gil living together, or fics where you settle down with Miss Alice~" Leo explained, showing the blond the link to the main page of the Pandora Hearts fanfics.

Oz's jaw dropped as he scrolled down the long _long_ list of fics. The ones he was watching out for were the ones that were rated 'M'. The summaries of those were making him…Never had he thought that this sort of situation would present itself to him…_ But...It's kind of..._

"Gil! Alice! Come here for a minute!"

The raven and the rabbit looked up from their ceaseless squabbling. Normally they ignored Oz when they were arguing (or at least Alice did, which just made the raven mad and so the vicious cycle started all over again) but this time Oz's voice sounded slightly strange…

With one last glower at Alice, the raven walked over to where Oz was standing next to Leo's side and leaned down peering worriedly at Oz. "Is something wrong Oz?"

"No, nothing is wrong Gil~ I just wanted to let you see this~" Oz pointed at the laptop's screen, which he had 'accidentally' chosen, which was a M-rated fanfic of the raven and him.

Gilbert stared at the screen. He couldn't see what Oz and Leo meant-

Nobody paid attention as the raven collapsed and fainted onto the floor from all the blood rushing to his head.

"Come and see Alice~ There are many fanfics of you as well~"

Alice then stepped over the raven, wondering why the raven was so pathetic at times. Staring at the laptop's screen, she couldn't understand most of the words, for example: 'aroused' 'pregnant' 'cock' and many other things that stupefied her.

"I'm quite surprised that Elliot would read this kind of stuff~"

"Indeed, Oz-kun~ I would never have guessed so as well~"

"…What's this…Oz…?"

"Oh Alice, I have to say that these fanfic writers apparently make you act quite whore-ish, since your true form is a large rabbit and everyone knows what rabbits think and do all the time~"

"Oi Oz!" Alice snapped, not pleased that she was being annoyed. She was feeling aggravated at Oz and the raven for something she couldn't quite figure out. For some reason, she thought she had missed something important-something _very_ important that happened between the two of them earlier when she had been daydreaming over her beloved meat. While they had been talking about how to distract that Nightray boy earlier, she had seen Oz and the raven exchange several glances, each time the raven quickly looking away and flushing red. According to the romance novels Sharon had let her read, when somebody's cheeks turned red, it meant... _…Why do I…what's this feeling… _Shaking her head, the rabbit was determined to focus back onto her current goal.

"What's a whore-ish? And Oz, what do you mean everyone knows what rabbits think and do all the time? I only like thinking about meat! …But I guess…sometimes-"

"…A whore, um I can't really describe it, its best you see for yourself Alice~"

"Miss Alice, quite a lot of people seem to pair you with Break~"

"Yup, there seem to be a lot of pregnant fics with you and him~"

"…Pregnant? What's that Oz?"

"Um, it's how children are born Alice~"

"WHAT? YOU MEAN PEOPLE PAIR ME-MAKE ME -DO _THAT_ WITH THAT _CLOWN_?" Alice squawked, horrific images flashing across her mind.

"These fanfic writers also like to combine their favourite pairings names together as well, Oz-kun~"

"They call it Brelice~"

"Apparently people like Gil and Alice together too~"

"Ah, but I'm impressed Oz-kun, you and Gilbert-kun seem to be the most popular pairing, ho ho~"

Nobody got any further as Alice ran to the bathroom to throw up everything she had eaten for the last twenty-four hours and then some more.

* * *

><p>"For the last time, I said <em>no<em>, Xerxes."

With the air of having just finished doing something unpleasant, Reim Lunettes returned to focusing on his paperwork, striving to ignore Xerxes Break, which he considered quite a feat as not only was Break sitting on his desk causing several sheets of paperwork to flutter to the ground, the white-haired man was leaning over him, close enough for Reim to smell the sweet sticky smell of Xerxes's ever present lollipop.

"Ahh, don't behave like that Reim-san~ I already told you that this is my lady's request, not mine~ You wouldn't want to disappoint Lady Sharon, would you~?" Break marked the end of the sentence, biting down on his lollipop with a loud _crunch, _causing some bits of the lollipop to fly onto the desk, dirtying it.

"That's what you said last time Xerxes, and I ended up bursting into a meeting of the four dukes to tell them that Pandora was being invaded by microscopic poisonous Chains that were invisible and that the only way to see them was by eating strawberry-flavoured lollipops and that one of their weaknesses was chocolate pie."

Break couldn't help smirking at the remembrance_. _Thanks to that, he had enough ammunition to blackmail Reim for the rest of his life. Then seeing Reim scowling at him, his smirk softened into a more persuasive smile. _But it was Reim-san's own fault for being such an excellent target to tease, just like Gilbert-kun and Oz-kun~_

"Ehhh, don't tell me you still hold it against me Reim-san~ I was just trying to make you loosen up~ All that paperwork cannot be good for your health, you know~" came the cheerful reply, with Break disapprovingly waving a finger at Reim.

This last sentence made Reim's eyebrow twitch. It was Break's fault that he was steadily getting buried with paperwork that wasn't even his own.

"Xerxes," he began, struggling to keep his increasing annoyance out of his voice. "This is my final warning. If you do not leave me in peace, I will-"

"My, what's happening here?"

"Ah, my lady!" Came Break's enthusiastic reply, as he hopped off Reim's desk and began walking to where his lady who had just entered the room was.

"L-Lady Sharon?" Looking up from his desk in disbelief, Reim saw Sharon Rainsworth, dressed in one of her favourite purple dresses, with a slight frown on her face, which was being aimed at Break. Immediately, Reim got up from his chair and bowed to Sharon, apologising for not greeting her earlier.

"I just came to see why Break was taking so long. Are you distracting Reim-san, Break?"

"Of course not my lady~ I am merely following your request to try and convince him to take a well-earned break from his work, and accompany us to Lutwidge Academy to see Oz-kun and his friends~" Break finished explaining, flapping his sleeves at Sharon.

"!" _Wait, that means Xerxes was telling the truth? Which means…_

Looking at Sharon's now smiling face, Reim knew he was in for it.

"So Reim-san, is it alright if you accompany us to see Oz-sama and his friends? You see, because we have been busy with Pandora business for the last few days, we haven't talked to them for quite awhile. And I'm sure they would like to see you as well."

Reim tried to make an attempt to escape.

"Lady Sharon I would be honoured to accompany you to see Oz-sama and the rest, but I really have too much work here for me-"

"So it's settled then Reim-san," Sharon went on, turning to where Break was sitting on the couch. "Get up Break we really must not waste time any longer."

"But Lady Sharon-!"

"What is it,_ Reim-san?_"

"…"

Score: Sharon: One. Reim: Zero.

Break, who had been remaining silent all this while and who was enjoying the show, grinned when he saw his lady's threatening aura aimed at poor Reim, who was visibly trembling. "Ho ho, poor Reim's caught now~" he whispered to Emily, whose round head nodded and then cackled, "Poor Reim! Poor Reim!"

"Please come closer Reim-san, you need to be close by for me to use Eques. You too, Break."

"Wh-what do you mean Lady Sharon? I-I mean if you want to travel to Lutwidge Academy to see Oz-sama and his friends, don't we have to travel by carriage?"

This innocent question caused Sharon to smile sweetly at Reim who by this time was visibly shrinking. _Oh dear Reim, you haven't changed a bit. _"As it will take about four hours to get to Lutwidge Academy, I have decided to use Eques as will save more time and there are only the three of us."

"But that will tire you out Lady Sharon!"

"Not at all, the distance from here to Lutwidge Academy is nothing for Eques. Are you ready now, _Reim-san_?"

With Sharon smiling ever so sweetly at him, Reim acutely realised that he was neatly trapped, like a fly wrapped in a spider's silken web. "In that case, I have no objections Lady Sharon…"

* * *

><p>AN: Another chapter done~ And yes, Break, Sharon and Reim will appear in the next chapter and poor Elly will have <em>a lot<em> of explaining to do. (Especially when he's being threatened by Sharon.)


	5. There's Always A Fangirl

**Chapter 5: There's Alway's A Fangirl.**

AN: …I honestly can't think up anything to put here, except much of my gratitude goes to those who commented previously on this fic and I do hope you enjoy the following chapter~

Disclaimer: I do not own Pandora Hearts. This fanfic is merely a product of my bored and fangirl mind.

* * *

><p>"Alice! Are you alright now?"<p>

"Do I look like it Oz…" the rabbit groaned, hunched over the toilet bowl in Elliot and Leo's bathroom. She had lost countless times of how many times she had thrown up ever since Oz had told her what the words on the screen meant-_especially with that clown! The horror of that moment she would never, **never** forget. _It was worse than the time Oz had told her she couldn't have meat during one of their missions from Pandora. It was worse than the time Oz had left her alone to drink tea with the clown. It was worse than Raven fussing over her manservant. Currently Oz was crouching down next to her, as the useless raven was lying unconscious on Leo's book-covered bed, with a handkerchief that Oz had placed on his face to staunch the nosebleed, while that Shaggy Glasses boy had disappeared.

Oz's mind was in a haze as in concern for Alice who fortunately hadn't thrown up for quite awhile (the last few minutes). He had seen the 'Brelice' fanfic himself and compared to _some-_empathise on _some_-Oz thought it was harmless-it was actually quite cute and not worth getting worked up over... On the other hand he hadn't been the one who had eaten a lot of meat beforehand… "Let me help you Alice!" Propping Alice onto his shoulder, ignoring the death threats and profanities he received in returned, Oz half carried, half dragged Alice over to the small couch at the side of the room. _I need to work out more often like Gil… _Oz thought as he collapsed next to the rabbit. The momentarily quiet hardly lasted though before the door flew open and the joyous greeting of, "Why, good evening everyone!"

_Break!_

Alice gulped as Break, Sharon and Reim entered the room. Break was flapping his sleeve in greeting, Sharon was smiling gracefully, looking as lady-like and queenly as usual, but Reim however looked very pale, and immediately after bowing shakily to Oz and nodding jerkily to the rest, he stumbled to the bathroom, clutching his stomach and mumbling something about travel sickness, and how he was going to bolt his office door in future to keep out unwanted paperwork intruders. Oz glanced at the bathroom door, where sounds of retching were repeating itself and then at Break who had flopped onto the sofa. "What's wrong with Reim, Break, Sharon-chan?"

"Ho Ho, it's nothing Oz-kun~ We came here by Eques, and unfortunately the ride was a bit bumpy, so now poor Reim is just feeling a bit sick~"

"There is nothing wrong with Eques's travelling ability, Break." Sharon answered in her demure tone, with just the hint of warning on her voice. "Perhaps if you hadn't been bouncing up and down on Eques's back and trying to get Reim-san to sing 'ninety nine pieces of candy on the wall' we would have had a less turbulent ride."

"Your words wound me, my lady, they honestly do~"

While this meaningful chat/quarrel went on eventually ending in Sharon whipping out her harisen and hitting Break with it, Alice was peeking behind a plotted plant, desperately looking around for means to escape. _The door's blocked. Raven's still sealing my powers. NOW WHAT._

"Alice-san? Why is such a lovely maiden like you looking so distressed?"

The almost hyperventilating rabbit sweat-dropped as she looked up from her pathetic hiding place into Sharon's pink eyes that were curiously examining her.

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

"Sharon…I mean Sharon…Shar-" _For the love of meat, what was the term?_ "…Onee-sama! I don't want to be in the same room with that clown-can I go somewhere else? _Now?_"

Sharon stared at Alice's thinly disguised plead. _They had only just arrived, and Xerxes-Nii San hadn't even talked to Alice yet, so what could possibly be wrong? …Oh, but…Alice was staring at her with those large wide purple eyes of hers framed by her silky looking brown hair, beseeching for Sharon's help, as well as a rosy blush on her face and a tiny pout on her pink lips…_ _how cuuuuute she was~ So adorable~_

_…If something wrong had happened, it was surely her duty as a big sister to Alice to punish those who were guilty. _"Very well Alice-san, come with Onee-sama."

Taking hold of Alice's hand to make sure that she didn't escape-purely for guiding Alice, Sharon swept elegantly past Break who had recovered and was wrapped up in talking gleefully to Oz, and seemingly oblivious to Sharon's sudden change of mood. _If you have done something to Alice,_ _I'll make sure you pay dearly later on **Break**._

Oz stopped talking half-way as he noticed Sharon holding Alice's hands and swiftly walking away. "Alice! Sharon-chan! Where are you two going?" Oz called after the two of them. No reply reached his ears however and Break smirked.

"Soooo Oz-kun, how was your reunion with Ada-sama, Elliot-kun and Leo-kun? I am also quite curious to the fact that Elliot-kun has a very large bruise on his forehead and is unconscious~ Did by any chance Alice-kun's temper get out of control?" _After all both of them were of the violent natured tsundere type~_

While keeping his smile, inwardly the blond face-palmed. He should have known that Break would have immediately noticed the noble's injuries. _Maybe I should have taken Alice's advice and left Elliot in a closet somewhere…_

"Ahahaha, it's a long story Break! You see, we found a letter on Ada's table that said she was going to a ball with some of her friends, and that she wouldn't be back till tomorrow…so me, Gil and Alice went to find Elliot and Leo~" Assuming his normal happy-go-lucky attitude, Oz shrugged at Break, as implying that he was simply going along with the flow. To Break's perceptive however, Oz unusually seemed to be on edge.

_Oh…?_

"My my, Oz-kun, if something is bothering you, do tell straight away~ You know I will find out one way or the other~"

_…He's right. Break would find out sooner or later…_

The next few minutes would be one of the most embarrassing moments of Oz's life and unforgettable moments for Break.

* * *

><p>Now that she was away from the potential danger known as Break, the rabbit had calmed down and was almost back to her normal self. Now that she thought about what she had read, she was feeling a bit indignant (not to mention confused, embarrassed, disbelieving as well) about it. <em>…I-I don't really mind some of the fics with me and Oz in them…but the rest-WITH THAT ONE OF RAVEN AND THE CLOWN-<em>

"Alice-kun?" Alice jumped slightly at her name called, before realising that she had been led into a small but cosy-looking room and that Sharon had already sat down, and was pouring out cups of tea. Feeling like it was her execution time, Alice sat down.

"Now Alice-san, tell all your troubles to Onee-sama here. Has Break troubled you in any way? If so, fear not for Onee-sama will get revenge for you."

"…Sharon-I mean Sharon-Onee-sama," Alice nervously said, seeing Sharon's meaningful look, "I-I can't stand it anymore! I mean, my manservant ignoring me and going to chat with that useless clown and the rest are bad enough, but earlier on I saw these words that were describing me and my manservant and Raven and even that clown and you doing weird things that I didn't understand and I asked Oz and he said that in one fanfic the words were making me and that useless raven – and there was even a weirder one with me doing something with meat-but the worst one was were that clown was doing something with me!"

"…Alice-san… what do you mean by _something_?"

"I don't know when I asked Oz, he handed one of the books that Shaggy Glasses had on his bed and it had people with sitting on one another and other weird positions…"

_Oh. **Oh.**_

"This is indeed most shocking news Alice-san! Can you tell me more about what these fanfics say?"

Unknown to Alice, this news about the fanfics was not surprising at all to Sharon. Why? Because she had discovered the wondrous world of fangirl paradise when she was just a child and knew almost every perverted form it could take.

* * *

><p><em>Sharon, who was curled up comfortably on her bed, was voraciously reading the last few pages of Lady Sylvie and Her Mongrels. A day ago, her mother and grandmother had presented her with this book, and both of them had solemnly said that this particular book was essential for bringing Rainsworth women up properly. Sharon also remembered her grandmother winking at her mother, but she had been too curious as to what the book had contained to ask questions. The very front cover of the book had a golden haired lady holding her beloved prince to her chest and smiling seductively, with a long black-haired woman in the background, with a blush staining her cheeks. On the back cover, it simply said in large pink bubbly text: Lady Sylvie explains it all in this novel on how to keep your lord in place and letting him know who the boss is. A must read for all women.<em>

_The moment Sharon held the book, __an irreversible chain reaction was set into motion. Right from the start of the book she was hooked. Not only did Lady Sylvie enlighten her on how to wrap your lord around your little finger, the pictures of the book were also **very** detailed on how to make him follow your every whim. One particular picture, which actually shouldn't be in a book for young ladies, had caused such a serious nosebleed to develop that young Sharon had to use many tissues to stop it. Unfortunately, reading only one book wasn't enough. The fangirl in Sharon had awoken and wanted **more**. So Sharon made some investigations( it was amazing what a little girl innocently playing with her dolls could overhear), and found out that one of the nobles that her mother had invited for a ball, had said that the best way to find anything you wanted was by using this thing called the 'internet'. So, after making sure her grandmother and mother were away on Pandora business, Sharon went into the enormous Rainsworth library, and angelically asked a librarian whether she could use a computer just for a teensy wincey little while, so she could learn how to make dresses for her dear dollies so they wouldn't be sad? Of course the unsuspecting librarian was no match against a Rainsworth woman. After directing her to Google and showing Sharon how to search for the things she wanted, the librarian left Sharon alone, thinking on how sweet the young Rainsworth heir was._

_Big mistake. _

_ The moment she was sure she was alone, Sharon changed from a sweet innocent naïve girl, to a determined fangirl, her tiny fingers flying over the keyboard, typing various phrases such as 'Rated for 18+ only', 'Yaoi4ever', 'Smut stories' and '101 naughty things you can do to make your lover love you even more.'_

_There were countless links and hits which when clicked on, made Sharon squeal in delight and feel flustered from the amazingly nosebleed pictures or words. One website called fanfiction(.)net caught her particular attention as they had the largest collection of smutty fanfics written by different people she had seen._

_In fangirl terms, she had struck gold._

_However, out of a whim she googled her name 'Sharon Rainsworth' with 'fanfics' as well, and nearly bit her tongue from shock when she saw that the first link shown led to fanfiction(.).net. Clicking on it, her pink-ish cranberry eyes turned enormous, as it was a loli-con fic centred around her and Reim-san, in which prudent Reim was caught by Sharon reading a porn book, with Sharon pestering to see it and know what was it about, as flustered Reim merely said it was an adult book and young children shouldn't read it. In the end, exasperated Reim just decided to show Sharon what it was all about. _

_Sharon's first thought after reading the fanfic was: I'm going to have to find some time to severely punish Reim-san for this._

_Sharon's **second** thought was: If there's a fanfic of me and Reim, are there fanfics with Mother, Xerxes-Nii san and the rest of the household?_

_This question opened up a whole new world for her, with many people she knew as the actors. From then onwards, Sharon was a devout worshipper of yaoi/yuri/hentai/incest and pretty much everything else. When she grew older, she even began to write a few naughty smutty drabbles and one-shots, displaying some fantasies she had thought up during long tedious Pandora meetings when she felt bored out of her mind. _

_And the delightful world of yaoi welcomed a new fangirl writer._

* * *

><p>Biting down her lip to resist the immense fangirl urge to squeal, Sharon schooled her expression to show only concern for the rabbit, and gently patted Alice's hand, who by this time was feeling extremely nervous at the fact that Sharon had not made a sound.<p>

"Alice-san, so you say that Leo-kun had noticed something had been bothering Elliot-kun of late, and in the end he found out it was these fanfics that were bothering Elliot-kun?"

"…Y-yes Sharon-Onee-sama! Oz said that he was helping Shaggy Glasses and that he would give me meat if I helped…"

Standing up, Sharon nodded determinedly. _So it was Elliot Nightray who had discovered the website first._ "Since Elliot-kun is the original culprit, Onee-sama shall question him myself. Put your worries to rest Alice-san, Onee-sama will get to the bottom of this."

* * *

><p>After taking a first-hand experience at examining these fanfics, Break sat back and inhaled a deep breath through his mouth. "These fanfics confirms my suspicions once and for all Oz-kun."<p>

"Suspicions…?"

"You and Gilbert-kun are indeed"-pause for dramatic breath- "G_ayyyyyyyyy_~~Or perhaps you're bi Oz-kun~~"

Break next had to dodge a teapot thrown at his head by Oz.

* * *

><p>Sharon pushed open the door to Elliot's and Leo's room only to hear Oz shout "I'M NOT GAY OR BI BREAK COME BACK HERE!", the tinkling of smashed silverware, and Emily's constant cackling and repeating of "Gay! Gay! He's gay!"<p>

"We'll wait ouside for a bit, Alice-kun..."

* * *

><p>Elliot groaned, as he awakened from unconscious, blinking blurrily and mumbling curses at the fact that his head felt like a lump of cement. As far as he could make out, he was in a room. His and Leo's room to be precise, as he could recognise a dent in the wall where he had punched it a few months ago after Leo pissed him off over something.<p>

_…What happened… I was chasing that shorty and his companions… and my sword was lying on the ground **covered in**-_

"Gil, Elliot's awake!"

"R-really…"

"My my, Elliot-kun sure took his time~"

"…Break, kindly _do not_ make that kind of face in my presence."

"My deepest apologies my lady, I merely got a bit excited~ Ah, is _this_ one any better my lady?"

The loud thud from Sharon's harisen hitting Break's cheek completely woke Elliot up, and he sat up in bed, ignoring the throbbing pain at the back of his skull.

_W-wait a moment, wh-why is Sharon Rainsworth here…Also that workaholic Lunettes-WAIT WHY IS THE XERXES BREAK HERE AS WELL-_

"Elliot-kun."

_F.U.C.K._

"Would you mind explaining what this website, and why it has-hmm how to put it-compromising situations of many of us inside it?"

"I-I-" For once in his life, Elliot Nightray was speechless.

"Ha ha, it's only to be suspected~ After all Elliot-kun is a young teenager~"

"He seems to have an unhealthy obsession with Leo-kun though."

"Ah, so you do like Leo-kun that way~"

"NO! I-YOU-I DON'T LIKE LEO THAT WAY! DON'T EVEN SAY IT! I WAS JUST-"

Elliot gulped when he realised he had the gang's full attention. Sharon was calming sipping tea, but Elliot was consciously aware of the threatening aura that was hovering above her, warning him to tell the truth. Break was sitting on the edge of Leo's bed, kicking his legs while munching on his lollipop, immensely enjoying the noble's discomfort, Alice was happily sitting in a corner chewing on meat, Reim looked permanently confused, Gilbert looked almost as embarrassed as Elliot felt and Oz…well to say the least, the young Vessalius's grin ought to have been locked up for the public decency's sake.

"...Never mind…" Elliot mumbled, feeling the tips of his ears turn red.

"Anyway~ Although finding out Elliot-kun's preference for males or females is important, I am more wary of how these unknown people know so much about all of our habits. If they can gather so much information about us, they could be a serious threat to Pandora. We must investigate this matter thoroughly."

Everyone: _Hold. It._

Oz's thoughts: _That's just an excuse Break! You just want to read M-rated fics of you and Sharon, don't you? You…I wouldn't mind reading more of the fics that have me, Gil and Alice in them though…_

Sharon's thoughts: _Oh my~ So I get to read my beloved yaoi without having to worry about anyone watching me~ Ah, but what will happen if one of the others find one of my own fanfics? Xerxes-Ni San will tease me awfully… I must take precautions. _

Alice's thoughts: _This meat is so succulent and juicy and delicious I love eating meat and it's all mine I'm not sharing it with anyone they can go get their own meat- _AN: (Yes Alice is totally oblivious to what's happening around her.)

Gilbert's thoughts: Currently nothing because he fainted again at the thought of him and Oz doing you-know-what.

Reim's thoughts: _Wh-what kind of sick people w-would write this! …About me and Xerxes and **L-lady** **Sharon**-!_

Cue nosebleed.

Elliot's thoughts:_ …The image of Xerxes Break I had in my mind just shattered…THE Xerxes Break…I can't even… I need to find Leo and explain to him… if I can actually look him in the eye…crap will this nightmare never end…_

Break's thoughts: _This shall be so very interesting! This must also be the reason why Alice-kun looked so uncomfortable before~ What great fun it will be to tease her about~ And Gilbert-kun is easy prey as well~ It's like taking candy from a baby~_(Break had actually done this before)_  
><em>

* * *

><p>As Oz looked around, he noticed that during the whole time Elliot and the rest had been speaking, Leo had never spoken. Come to think of it, he hadn't seen the noirette since Leo had shown him the fanfics…<p>

Leo had in the meantime had snuck away to the peace and quiet of Lutwidge's library. He needed time to arrange his scattered thoughts, and among the hubbub of his and Elliot's room he couldn't concentrate. Now, among the total silence in the empty library where the few people who worked here had gone for dinner, he could think. Never, _never_ had he thought that his hot-tempered master, who became flustered and roared at the noirette to shut up if Leo even mentioned something slightly perverted (for example Edgar kissing a maiden he had rescued in Holy Knight), would actually read about other people fucking. Admittedly, Leo wasn't one to judge as he himself read Ero and many other 18+ rated things, _but_ _still_. His strait-laced tsunderemaster Elliot Nightray…was a _total_ pervert. _No wonder he couldn't look me in the face these last few days…_ Leo mused.

_I wonder what I will discover next. Fu fu fu, I will make sure Elliot is going to severely regret not telling me about these fanfics earlier~ It will be such fun to watch him squirm~ **And** when he's already read so many fanfics of us fucking~ The nerve of him especially after yelling at me so many times for reading Ero…_

* * *

><p>AN: I reached the end of this chapter only to realise that Leo had poofed, so I just added the bit where he disappeared off to at the end. Pathetic of me, I know. (-.-)<p>

Oh ho what is this, I have made Sharon one of us~ I mean come on, I can see here reading/writing yaoi fanfiction and squealing all the time. XD


	6. A Dreadful Deed Has Been Done

**Chapter 6: A Dreadful Deed Has Been Done.**

AN: Special thanks goes to **peppermint twertle **for inspiring me for an idea from one of her PMs~ Your wish will hopefully come up soon~

**Regarding the disclaimer:** I have put a disclaimer for all the fandoms I write for on my profile. Therefore, I will not put a disclaimer in every chapter from now on.

* * *

><p>Xerxes Break surveyed the faces around him. Elliot Nightray looked pale, Oz-kun looked…<em>weirdly <em>happy, Alice-kun didn't care, his lady seemed pleased… and of course Reim and the pathetic raven who was still unconscious-well their opinions didn't count. _Hohoho, I wonder where this will lead to? _"Alrightttttt, so my lady, Reim-san and I will go and see the headmaster of this academy while the rest of you stay here. If any of you are _gone _when we come back_,_" Break said, his tone never changing while letting his gaze linger on Elliot-who looked mortified to find his former 'idol' look knowingly at him- "I will _personally_ hunt down the unfortunate person myself~" With that, Break hopped off the couch he had been lounging on and had just put his hand on the doorknob when he unmistakeably felt the iron-grip of his lady on his shoulder. _Uh-oh. _This was not helped by Emily admitting a soft cackle and saying in her creaky voice, **"Time is up for you old man~" **

_"So __**eager**__ aren't you, __**Break**__?"_ Sharon cooed, tightening her grip on Break's shoulder to the point of which she could draw blood, her sugary sweet voice just hinting of menace. Behind her, Oz and the rest sweat-dropped and shamelessly retreated to the far side of the room, as they didn't want to be in the crossfire of whatever was going to happen next.

To be honest, Sharon was just as eager to read the fanfics as Break was. Since she had been so busy with Pandora business and the trouble Oz and company always seemed to cause, she had barely time to read her beloved fanfics, let alone write them. However, she was _not_ going to give herself away by agreeing so easily with Break's actions as they were unfortunately not socially correct. She had the Rainsworth name to hold up after all, and she could only begin to imagine the amount of teasing and hints Xerx-Nii would give her if he ever found out about her...secret. _That. Must. Never. Happen._

"Your words are so harsh my lady! We must deal with this potentially dangerous situation as soon as possible~" Break gallantly said, feeling the impending amount of doom about to land on him and mentally bracing himself for his lady's harisen attack. His cheek still stung from yesterday… After all he wasn't a masochistic, despite unknown to him the many fanfics which said otherwise.

"Oh? Is that so,_ Break?_" Sharon smiled, her hands itching to whip out her harisen to hit Break firmly on the head and knock some sense into him. _One more false step Xerx-Nii._

"Of course my ladyyyyyy~" -Break had figured out since he was going to be hit from his actions, he might as well get some amusement from this- "And I do say, you must surely be curious to what these fanfics contain from the many improper romance novels for a lady you read-"

That did it. With all her might, Sharon swung her harisen at Break, wanting nothing more to see the white-haired man as a bloody pulp on the ground. The smacking sound as harisen hit Break's cheek was one of the most satisfying things she had ever heard. "HOW _DARE_-"-_Whack_-"YOU INSULATE-" -_Whack_- "SUCH A THING-" -_Whack_- "**XERXES BREAK!**"

Oz shook in awe as he peeked from behind the couch where he was hiding, just in case. Sharon-chan was using not only her harisen to beat up Break, but also used her dainty-like shoes to stomp down on Break's defenceless body. "_S-Sharon-chan is so cool…"_ Oz breathed out as he watched her grind Break to a pulp._  
><em>

Tucking her slightly out of place hair behind her ears, Sharon turned away from Break's formerly occupied body, only to see everyone shaking behind the couch on the other side of the room. Once they saw Sharon was back to normal, they guiltily stood up. _The things that I do will never be understood. _"Please pay attention everyone. Due to what we have found out today, it is important we must solve it. Unfortunately since it is so late at night already, we have no choice but to sleep here at Lutwidge for tonight as I am feeling too tired from using Eques to transport all of us. Therefore, I shall go and see the headmaster of this school about our sleeping arrangement for tonight." Without waiting, Sharon elegantly swept out of the room, heading to where the headmaster's office was. The headmaster of Pandora was an agent of Pandora, so Sharon wasn't worried that he would refuse what she wanted. But the reason she wanted to go alone to see the headmaster, was because of a little surprise she had in plan for the rest of the gang.

* * *

><p>-Back In The Room-<p>

Oz swallowed and turned to face Alice and the rest. "What do you think-"

"I'm back everyone~" _How did Sharon-chan do that? _"I have talked to the headmaster of this school. He has no objections with us staying here overnight, but since it is a school term, virtually all of the rooms in the school are occupied. Since there are eight of us, including Elliot's valet when he returns, we have no choice to share this room and one other room. Three of us will stay here, while the other four will go to the other two available rooms. Does anyone have objections?"

There were of course many protests rising up in the more innocent-minded souls as Sharon's ominous words sank in, but with Sharon looking at them like she was some sort of _smiling Spartan_, no one dared to say anything.

Amongst the awkward silence, one brave soul decided to speak up.

"La-lady Sharon…" Reim muttered, wiping his glasses with his Pandora uniform, sweat-dropping as every inch of his body yelled at him to _run_, "How-how exactly do you intend to split us u-up?" Inwardly, Sharon giggled to herself. _That's exactly the point my dear naive Reim. If everyone is crowded together after reading such fanfics, they'll start thinking of each other in __**different**__ ways. And then-They might even- ~__**Chuu~ **__Or-or-_

Reim choked slightly as he stared at Sharon who was wriggling in delight, with her hands on either side of her cheeks and she was making little...well noises…This was very improper behaviour… "L-lady Sharon-"

"Well! I agree with what Sharon-chan said!" Every gaze of those who weren't beaten up or unconscious or eating meat turned to the short blond in the room, as Oz pulled out a rose from seemingly nowhere. "For the sake of everyone else, I, Oz Vessalius, will be willing to share-"

Break chose this moment to rise up from the dead. **"Don't even say it least you want to suffer a painful end Oz-kun~"**

"Wahhhh, so mean Break!" Instantly Oz pouted, as his brilliant plan fell to ruins and ashes. "In that case, I'll sleep with Gil!"

There was a strangulated 'PFFT' from Break at that sentence, a cackle from the doll Emily (by this time Elliot was convinced that the doll could be a second Break in doll form), a smothered gasp of delight from Sharon which she tried to hide by faking a cough and just a general '_what the fuck did I just hear_' expressions from the other people. Including Elliot. _Especially_ Elliot.

"It's settled then!" Sharon quickly added in, before anyone else could protest. This was a god-sent opportunity to get some pictures of Oz and Gilbert _cuddling. Cuddling_. Thank goodness she had gotten a camera from her mother for her last birthday. To the public, cameras were still very clunky and large, so to be presented with a pocket-sized camera that she could whip out at any time to take pictures of embarrassing sweet yaoi moments that really screamed: I HAVE TOO MANY FEELS FOR YOU MARRY ME. Ahem. She planned to blackmail Oz and the rest later on as well with the pictures she had secretly gathered some time…soon. "Oz-sama and Gilbert-san will retire in the other room, while Alice-kun and I will stay in the other room, Reim-san, Elliot-kun and his valet can stay in this room which is rightfully their own-"

"What about me my ladyyyyyy?~" Break interrupted, crunching down on a lollipop. Sharon twitched. _Why is Xerxe-Nii like some kind of_ _zombie? He always recovers far too fast from my harisen._

_SMACK. _Dragging Break out of the room, Sharon shut the door.** "**_**Break can stay as far as possible and can sleep outside the door."**_

It was around this time Gilbert woke up, and asked, "What happened…?" in that world-wear voice I'm-expecting-the-worst-to-happen voice of his, that caused _so_ many fangirls to write angsty drabbles of the raven about the doom and gloom of the world. The raven had not even got up before Oz pounced on him.

"Gil! Gil! I'm sleeping with you tonight!"

"_Eh you Oz-Oz-" _Gilbert shook his head, of course Oz wouldn't…"Wh-what do you mean Oz..? Why how-"

Elliot watched appalled, as like the Black Plague, some of the people he was most annoyed at took over his room, his bed, his chair, _his fucking piano_. _Shit, if I believed in that crappy stuff, I would think this is karma._ _Huh, how come Leo hasn't returned yet… _Elliot swore under his breath, as he watched as creepy diva-like Sharon Rainsworth got sleeping bags and such out of _nowhere_-_did she plan this from the start_- Xerxes Break sneaking back in making little boo-hoo noises, shorty Oz playing with his pathetic foster older's brother's hair who seemed still dazed, while the meat girl Alice who had finished her meat was staring at them and workaholic Reim just stood there in the centre of the room looking useless, rubbing his glasses very, very hard.

As he passed Xerxes Break, the creepy doll on the red-eyed man's shoulders cackled in a very loud voice. "Gay! Gay! The Nightray boy and blondie have the hots for their servants!"

Elliot was so tempted to give the doll his middle finger-, but with his former idol Xerxes Break smirking at him-_how had he missed how perverted Xerxes Break's smile was? Like a __**sadist**__ or something_- prideful Elliot Nightray decided to give in for now and go to sleep. He would go to look for Leo as soon as possible. He would find Leo no matter what, come hell or high water or the wrath of that Rainsworth girl…because Leo was his _friend_; his only friend no matter how sappy and corny it sounded. And he really needed to go and find a wall to hit his head on from this mess that he had brought onto himself…

_Crack. _The attention was immediately on Reim, who had apparently cracked his glasses' specks by rubbing them too hard…

"_My glasses…" _Reim croaked out. _This was all Xerxes's fault...  
><em>

"Ho ho ho, that's really pathetic Reim-san~"

_-_Smack_- _"Keep _quiet_ Break."

"_Excuse me while I go and replace my old ones…_"

* * *

><p>Reim sighed as he paced up and down the long corridors of Lutwidge. It was fast approaching midnight, so no one would see him. He needed a little time to think by himself.<p>

"_Keep close to thy Hatter and his companions Reim. Update thee on any information thy knave." _

_Rufus-sama's orders were to update him on anything out of the ordinary…do these '**fanfics**' count? ARRGHHH WHAT SHOULD I DOOOOOO- _Reim inwardly ranted as he paced back and forth, back and forth, now wearing his spare pair of glasses he kept at all times in his Pandora uniform.

**_What if Rufus-sama thinks it's a waste of time? Then he'll be might be annoyed arrgh and might take it out on Xerxes and maybe even Oz-sama and I've still got paperwork I haven't completed yet and Xerxes's paperwork too-  
><em>**

In the end Reim decided to take some aspirin, report to Rufus-sama, do his mountain of paperwork and then find some dark hole to crawl into.**  
><strong>

* * *

><p>"Vincent-sama wasn't that tarot reading fun? We should do it again soon! I can't wait for the shop to deliver those books on voodoo~ It's so fascinating about the rites ~ And I really wanted to get that lovely cauldron they had on sale, it's twice as big as the one I currently have-"<p>

_This woman cannot shut up, _Vincent thought, as he kept a smile plastered on his face while listening to the blonde girl ramble on and on about occult nonsense. _I despise that kind of thing_. At least she had gotten rid of that slutty witch dress. _Witch? No._ _Harlot, maybe. But it's all for Gil I'm doing this. To make Gil happy, I will do anything and everything._

"Maybe we should do palm reading next time, Vincent-sama? I heard it's more accurate than tarot reading but I think-!"

Dropping to his knees, Vincent gently took hold of Ada's hand, pressing it to his lips and ghosting over her palm with his breath. "Ada-sama…May I be honoured enough to receive a parting gift from you..? Fate is cruel…I do not know when I can next gaze my eyes on you... And yet my urge to be with you every moment of the day is like a thirst I cannot quench…a hunger…I need something, anything from you…to keep close by me until I see you again…" Vincent purred, gazing into those emerald eyes, so like _Jack's_. It made Vincent want to vomit bile, or better yet, gorge out those sickening emerald eyes with his scissors, just like he did to Cheshire. _Sweet, tainted words, to fall into my trap. A delicate strand to hold you in place as my web tightens._

"Vi-Vincent-sama..!" Ada's head was a whir and her heart was going _doki doki_ so fast she was sure Vincent-sama could hear it. _How was she supposed to respond to his actions?_ She had never learnt the proper decorum of a lady on how to respond to a man's romantic actions, since Ada could barely remember her mother. She had gotten her knowledge from other women gossiping and the many romance novels she had read. But now Vincent-sama was looking at her with those mysterious mismatched eyes of his…dragging her down into those alluring depths that seemed to hide both sadness and amusement, asking her to…_Sure-surely it wouldn't hurt to let Vincent-sama ki-__**kiss **__her hand…? _

"AHA!" Ada jumped (except Vincent) as Oz's uncle, Oscar, sprang out of one of the hedges. _"…"_

"Ah? Oscar-sama? My my…"

"…Uncle?" Ada's face was slowly turning crimson as all her blood rushed to her cheeks, when she realised how this scene would look to her uncle , who looked dumbstruck, and well-judging by the way his glasses had cracked, jaw dropped and the sinister aura surrounding him, this wasn't good…

This is how the scene looked to Oscar: Vincent was on his knees looking exactly like the poster child for a Casanova, **holding** Ada's hand in his hand, which was _pressed to his lips_. Ada's cheeks were apple-red and she had been stammering and stuttering, just like any maiden in a fairytale, as the good-for-nothing prince asked her to marry him. Deducing this from the scene, Vincent must be asking his precious Ada to marry him. Therefore, there was a simple solution to this. Vincent Nightray must now die to pay for his unforgivable sin.

Oscar took a deep breath, which seemed to Vincent that it was a good sign, that Oscar was trying to remain calm.

He was _wrong_.

"**VINCENT NIGHTRAY YOU-" **Oscar seemed to choke on his words, searching for a word vile enough to describe the scum known as Vincent Nightray-**"VERMIN BASTARD ****PLAYBOY SICK IN THE HEAD PIECE OF SHIT NIGHTRAY STALKER CASANOVA OF A SEWER RAT HOW DARE YOU TRY THAT WITH ADA-**"

Back in Elliot and Leo's room, Break opened his eyes from where he had been dozing. He wasn't going to sleep. Sleep left him…too vulnerable.

"Looks like that slimy sewer rat snuck in and got caught…"


	7. Hands up! Children

**Chapter 7:**** Hands up****! Children.**

* * *

><p><em>It's time to wake up. <em>However, Gilbert kept his eyes firmly shut as he struggled to rouse himself out of the sticky, warm drowsy haze of sleep_. _But the comforting softness, the warmth of the blanket loosely draped over him overpowered his will, made him sink back into oblivion. It was just so _warm_ in here. He felt like a child again, knowing so long as he was safely wrapped in bed, no monsters Oz used to tease him about could get him. In other words, nothing bad could happen. _Hah…It's been a long time since I had such a peaceful sleep, _the raven mused, tightening his grip around something soft, warm and huggable-a pillow probably, warmed by his body heat-and pulling it closer to him. Normally his dreams were restless, fragments of his forgotten past coming back to taunt him, the Raven's raspy voice, even clouded memories of the master he had failed to protect. But this time all that remained from his forgotten dream was a sense of peacefulness and comfort that everything would turn out right in the end...

Gilbert couldn't but help twitch his lips into a wry smile, nuzzling deeper into the softness of the pillow. God, it felt good just for a little while to let go of all his worries and concerns. If he tried, he could almost pretend the pillow was Oz's sun-spun hair tickling his face, Oz's silky blond hair that felt so _soft _and_ delicate _when he ran his fingers through it when Oz was being brattish or when he placed his hand on Oz's forehead to release B-Rabbit...

"_Gilll__lllllll__l...geroff__ffff__f-"_

The raven could almost imagine he could hear Oz's voice. His thoughts hazed back to their childhood to the times when both of them were children again, and Oz would wake up the raven by prodding him, and demanding Gilbert to hurry up and get up so they could go out and explore with Ada-sama…

"_You're squishing mee__ee__eeee"_

_Squishing? Wait..._ The raven's eyes shot open, and realised to his utmost shock, that the thing he had been snuggling for _god knows how long_ was Oz. _Oz_. Not only was his face nuzzling Oz's neck, but the raven had his arms wrapped tightly about the blond's body, with Oz's body tucked against the raven's much longer frame. The blond was having difficulty breathing, as the raven was literally _squeezing_ him, the way a little girl would squeeze and cuddle her favourite doll. For the sake of his sanity Gilbert couldn't bring himself to admit he had been groping the blond. _"OZ?" _Performing some wild gangly spider-like movement, Gilbert yanked his arms back and scooted away from the blond, stammering only to fall unglamorously off the couch he had been sleeping on and onto to his butt. W_hat happened last night? Did I do something to Oz? Why is O-Oz-_Sharon's bedroom arrangement last night. _Damn it to all hells. _Gilbert could feel his soul escaping as he remembered the events yesterday.

"Oi Gilllllllll, I didn't think you were that desperate to get some…" Oz huffed out as he sat up right, massaging his sore neck. The night before, after they had retired to their assigned room, the raven had turned into a martyr, grimly taking the couch, insisting that Oz take the bed. It was _ridiculous_. Gil was acting like being in the same room alone with Oz was dangerous to the blond's innocence, like Oz was some sort of defenceless lamb and Gil was the big bad wolf! So Oz did what any self-respecting master would do-when he had been sure Gil had drifted off to sleep, he wriggled his way from the bed onto the couch, shifting his way around until he got comfortable._ Just wait Gil, _Oz mused darkly, _a kiss flustered you that much? One day I'll do much worse to you, like in those fanfics, whips, chains, toys-but not ropes because ropes are for girls- to tease the life out of you._ _There's a reason why I top in those fanfics. And as for those few fanfics where Gil is on top…well that's __**not**__ happening. _After all, it was impossible for anyone –hell even the random hobo on the street- not to notice the obvious and sometimes embarrassing crush that the raven had on him. Therefore, it was Oz's duty as an all-caring master to make his servant's life a living hell.

"I'm so sorry Oz!" Oz shot a look at the raven, and wasn't surprised to see the raven on his knees, heavily flustered. Swinging his legs off the couch, Oz walked over to where Gil was and prodded him on the shoulder. "Gilllll, get up already. You look too pathetic, and it's way too tempting to bully you." This surprisingly didn't lift Gil from his overwhelming embarrassment. "Gil." Prod. "Gil, I'll get a cat in here if you don't budge." Prod.

It worked like a charm. Gil got up, albeit looking as though he wished a hole to the Abyss would open up and swallow him. Oz huffed. "Jeez Gil, it's about time you got up!" Pointing to the clock that hung above the doorway, he took hold of the raven's hand, forcefully dragging them to the door. "Gil! It's 8:30am! We're supposed to meet Sharon-chan and the rest at 8!"

As Oz dragged him down Lutwidge's corridors, Gilbert's thoughts were whirling. He was still stuck on as to how exactly Oz had appeared on the couch when he was supposing, but the more pressing matter that had haunted and tormented him as he lay in bed the previous night was the fact that Oz had-

"Oz."

Oz groaned, as the raven stopped walking. After yesterday's events, Oz _really_ wanted to know what Sharon-chan and Break intended to do today. "What is it now Gil? Sharon-chan going to scold us…"

This was how Gil intended the conversation to go: He would ask Oz calmly, without a single hair out of place or sign of embarrassment, why had Oz kissed him yesterday in full view of the stupid rabbit and Elliot's valet. He would be immune to any tricks, puppy-eyes or bullying Oz had up his sleeve, and would not let the matter go until Oz had given him a sufficient answer.

Instead it went like this:

"Oz… yesterday when I agreed to help you and Leo…why did you..._kis_-" Gil swallowed nervously, instantly forgetting everything he had just planned. What he wouldn't give to smoke a cigarette now. _How the hell was he suppose to say it? _"Oz you k-kissed…_me _w-why…" the raven stuttered out, looking at his feet. God, this was embarrassing. What must Oz be thinking? _I'm an idiot._ Obviously it was just some sort of prank or even a dare set by **Break**. Yes, that was it. Somehow Break had known of thosefanfics before they had come to Lutwidge Academy, and had persuaded Oz to kiss him for Sharon's enjoyment-

"_Pffftttt_~"

_What? Oz is…_laughing?The raven stared aghast at the blond, who was visibly trembling not to laugh. "Fuuu~ The reasons is simple Gil~ First-" Here Oz's smirk grew wider as he held up one finger to the bewildered raven. "I wanted to experiment with something I saw in Sharon-chan's books~ Second, I wanted to_ humiliate _you~ And now that I've found about these fanfics that so many fangirls like to write about us, we should give them a good show, don't you think Gil? They may even be watching now so _Gil_…"

* * *

><p>"My lady, wouldn't it have been better idea to wait for Oz-kun and Gilbert-kun? I didn't even get to finish my cake-"<p>

"Kindly keep quiet Break. It's already almost 9am, Oz-sama and Gilbert-sama must have overslept." Sharon stiffly replied. She, Break, Elliot and Alice-kun (Reim-san had mysteriously disappeared during the night) had been waiting for the raven and the blond to arrive for over an hour. What were they up to? _Unless_-Sharon's cheeks turned pink as she thought this-_Oz-sama and Gilbert-sama stayed up late last night doing __**strenuous**__ activities-No! I mustn't think of that now. Calm down Sharon Rainsworth, and save it for fanfic material later. _

"My lady…" Sharon roused herself out of her thoughts, looking behind to see that Break and the rest had stopped in their tracks. It wasn't Break she focused on though, it was Alice. Alice looked shocked, _scared_. The reason was obvious. Right ahead of them, Gilbert was slumping against the wall, being obstructed by Oz, who was tugging with his teeth at the raven's ear-piece, before moving down to nibbleGilbert's neck, which was already covered with bitemarks and hickeys. Both of them were so obviously focused on each other, that they were oblivious to their surroundings.

Sharon took it upon herself to attract their attention. This was bad, very bad. As much as she shipped Oz/Gil-and god they did look so _cute _together, Sharon wouldn't never want Alice who was like her little sister to get hurt.

"Oz-sama…Gilbert-sama…?"

_Ah, it's Sharon-chan. _Stepping away from Gil, Oz turned to see Sharon, Break, Elliot and Alice. _Alice_. Oz only had a split second of seeing the look of shock and hurt on Alice's face before Alice spun around and dashed away. "Alice!" _Crap!_ Without another thought, Oz ran after Alice, pushing aside Break and Elliot, running after Alice's rapidly disappearing form. _If you had just waited a little longer Alice!_

Gilbert couldn't believe it as he watched Oz dash after the brunette. It was then he felt an emotion he rarely felt when it came to Oz–anger. Why had Oz tossed him aside the minute he had seen the stupid rabbit? And it wasn't just this one time either. It was every single time. And this time it had been special. They had been kissing. And yet the minute Oz had seen Alice, he had immediately run after her, leaving Gilbert behind. "Oz!" He was going to get an answer.

"Fu fu fu! ~ That was very entertaining, wasn't it my lady?"

Sharon stared at Break. She hadn't expected Break to be overly concerned for the trio, but to be amused by Alice feeling hurt by Oz and Gilbert? "Break. How in any way can you find this entertaining? Alice must be feeling extremely hurt!" Sharon herself felt torn between sympathy for Alice, and for Oz and Gilbert. _What was a fangirl supposed to do? Let alone side with?_ And for Break to be enjoying their pain…well, obviously he hadn't enough of her harisen.

Flapping his sleeve at her while unwrapping a lollipop wrapper, Break shrugged. "My lady, sooner or later poor little confused Oz-kun will have to choose between Gilbert-kun or Alice-kun. Best to sort it out now, mmm? Oh and-" Break looked at Elliot who was shaking in supressed rage and embarrassment, "Why are you still here Elliot-kun? I'm amazed you haven't snuck off to find your valet. Shoo shoo, you're be as useless as Gilbert-kun if you stay here~"

Elliot glowered at the man. How the _hell_ had he ever respected this man? Well Xerxes Break was the strongest man in Pandora…but Elliot was coming to the realisation that that could only make up so much for being a troublesome and loving to embarrass other people person who ate sweets all day. And Xerxes Break was apparently the mentor of shorty. Really Elliot should have seen it coming. _And_ while Gilbert was more or less useless, he was still a Nightray. Closing his eyes, Elliot took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He noticed Leo sometimes doing it when they were arguing and it seemed to work for his valet. As expected, it had failed miserably. Opening them, he prepared to see a smirking Break and a worried Sharon Rainsworth.

Instead he saw nothing.

_Damnit why does everyone keep wandering off? Gah, damn this!_ He would deal with shorty being a Casanova and playing with his adopted brother's feelings later. Right now, the urge to find Leo and explain was overwhelming. But before that he had to make a quick trip...

* * *

><p>"Rufus-sama." Reim murmured , stopping a few feet away from the red-haired man and bowed. He had returned to the Barma household, after receiving Rufus-sama's reply about Reim's latest report. "Rufus-sama…you wanted to see me about the matter of those fanfics?" <em>Please please please tell me Rufus-sama isn't going to be angry…<em>

Rufus snapped closed his harisen. Ever since he had received Reim's report a few hours ago, he had been…thinking. _Fu fu fu…_ "Ah, thou fanfics? 'Twas unique…" And then Rufus had one of his little moments. _**I wonder whether how many of these fanfics there are with fair Sheryl and I, I am sure we must be one of the most popular pairings on thee website-**_" Reim made a strangulated sound as hearts popped into existence around his master as Rufus continued talking about Sheryl-sama. _I'm going to be driven into a mental asylum between Xerxes and Rufus-sama at this rate… _Reim's glasses cracked slightly as Rufus went into further depth of how "_Sheryl and I must be thou star-crossed lovers Romeo and Juliet in thee fanfics, the story our tragic-_"

"R-Rufus-sama…I m-must inform you that… from the information I could gather…there was only _one_ fanfic of you…and none of S-Sheryl-sama…" Reim stammered out. He regretted almost instantly as Rufus stopped talking immediately and the hearts-which were a deep ruby red- turned black, broke in half and sailed to the floor.

"Reim…"

"R-Rufus-sama?" _Oh shit-_

"Reim…"

"Rufus-sama p-please get a hold of yourself-"

"Reim…_This is an outrage Reim!_" The brunette watched agog, as Rufus, who Reim had always known as a level-headed person except when it came to Sheryl-sama, flipped a table which Reim had put _all_ his finished paperwork as well as some full ink pots. _**The paperwork…**_Reim frantically dived to towards the split paperwork while his master raged on. "Thou writers have no taste at all Reim! I —Pandora—to—situation—" Since Reim was scrambling on the floor, salvaging the paperwork and grimacing at the ones which were ink-smudged, he didn't pay much attention to the rest of his master's words. If Reim had, it would have saved a lot of embarrassing moments especially for him later.

* * *

><p>The doorbell tinkled as Elliot swiftly entered the shop. The tiny bookshop was sandwiched in between the much larger and boisterous women and men boutique shops. Elliot had found it by chance one day when he had gone into town to buy the latest volume of Holy Knight. Unfortunately his efforts had been thwarted as the normal bookstore where he bought Holy Knight from was sold out. He had been stomping back to Lutwidge Academy when rain suddenly began pouring out of nowhere, and he had quickly stuffed himself into the nearest store for shelter. It really had been a serendipitous discovery.<p>

_Focus_. Elliot quickly began walking through the store, running his fingers over the covers of the books. _Where were they?_ He didn't have much time left, he needed to be back at Lutwidge.

* * *

><p>AN: The title of this chapter comes from <strong>Are You Alice?<strong> another Alice in Wonderland themed manga that I'm quickly becoming obsessed with. I think it's mainly the White Rabbit's fault. I want to stroke his long fluffy ears so badly... /OAO/

On another note, I've been wanting to write Oz/Gil fluff after the latest chapters of PH.…But Rufus is quite hard to write because of the way he talks. Gah, I _know_ applying 'thee' and 'thou' to his sentences doesn't make his speech in character. QAQ


	8. Revelations

**Chapter 8: Revelations**

AN: Thank you to all my reviewers, especially the anonymous **Are You Alice?** reviewer~ *nods head* **Are You Alice?** really is an unappreciated manga. *coughgoreaditcough*

* * *

><p>Alice ran.<p>

She could hear shouts from Oz to stop behind her, and shouts for both of them to stop from Gilbert.

The brunette didn't care because the ache in the middle of her chest was back. _Weird. It's weird._ It was as though she had been attacked by a Chain there. _Run_. Why was she running? She should be beating up Oz and the stupid raven and demand what exactly were they doing without her permission-

_Rabbits die when they get lonely._

Where had she heard that? Alice couldn't remember. But it was right. In some way she was losing Oz to the raven. What Oz had been doing to the raven earlier-it was what she had done to Oz the first time they had met to seal the contract.

* * *

><p>"<em>Sharon, what are they doing?" the brunette asked as she prodded the picture of a man and a woman kissing in the romance novel they were reading together in Sharon's bed. "Are they sealing a contract?"<em>

"_No Alice-kun~ It's what two people do when they love-I mean when they want to cheer up the other person or show affection for him or her," Sharon stated, raising an eyebrow as she noticed her use of her name without the honorific._

"_They bite each other cheeks? That's what I did to Oz in Sablier, but Shaggy Glasses's friend said I wasn't supposed to be biting him!"_

_Sharon bit her lip, feeling confused at Alice's words. Hadn't they discussed this before? "No Alice, they don't bite each other's cheeks, they kiss. After all, isn't that what you did with Oz-sama when you formed a contract with him?"_

* * *

><p>Kiss…Alice flinched as she heard a voice open up from a memory, a voice almost exactly like hers, only more feminine and gentler, giggle. Pain suddenly exploded in her head and Alice fell to her knees, gripping her head, biting her tongue to prevent from crying out. It felt like her head was being cracked opened, like an egg-<em><strong>"Hee Hee!"<strong>_

_The Will of the Abyss!_

"_**Now you should understandddddd!"**_

"_**No matter where you go… you'll always be alone!~"**_

Alone. The stupid Will Of The Abyss had been right from the beginning_. _Wherever Alice was, there was always a barrier separating her from others-people who were _normal_. There was no place for a memory-less Chain like her besides the Abyss. No place next to people. No Oz, no stupid raven, no Sharon not even that clowny bastard-No Oz.

"Alice?!" Oz shouted, as caught up with Alice who was on the polished wooden floor of Lutwidge, gasping heavily and clutching her head with her hands. As he ran up to her, the brunette gritted her teeth, and viciously yanked out several strands of her chocolate-coloured hair. Oz sensed Gil coming up from behind him, but all he could see was Alice in front of him, hurting.

"Alice!" Oz fell down onto his knees, grasping Alice's sleeve and shaking her in increasing desperation. "Alice-" That was all the blond had time to say before the brunette kicked him away, forcefully enough that Oz would have hit the opposite wall if Gilbert hadn't caught him from behind.

"Oz leave me alone!" Alice spat out, getting to her feet unsteadily. Ignoring Oz's look of shock and the rapidly darkening face of the raven, Alice plowed on. "Oz! Between the stupid raven and me, who are you better comrades with-"

"Stop right there you stupid rabbit! You have no right to ask Oz that! Do you understand me? You have no right!" the raven shouted, his voice echoing down the hall as he yanked Oz behind him, glaring at Alice. Alice was on her feet by now, glaring and trembling slightly in hatred-and was that a glimmer of fear?- in her eyes at the raven for interrupting her_. **I don't care about the stupid rabbit's feelings**._ Even though he was angry at Oz, he couldn't let the brunette finish her question. He could not. Oz was his master, and Gilbert _knew_ that if Oz answered Alice's question, there was a chance. There was a chance Oz might say that he treasured Alice over Gilbert, that he would prefer being next to Alice's side and Alice's side only and leave Gilbert behind, all alone in the darkness.

_No_.

_I can't lose my master again._

The raven opened his mouth again, ready to yell at Alice when-"Gilbert." Gilbert looked down, and realized that he had been gripping Oz's shoulders tightly, as though Oz might be stolen away from him. Very gently, Oz removed out of Gilbert's grip, stepping away from both the brunette and the raven, looking at both Gil's and Alice's disbelieving faces. "Gil. Alice. Please don't look like that. Ah…I guess I have no choice now, huh? To avoid hurting Gil and Alice any more than I already have."

_I've finally realized it. How must it have felt for Alice when she saw me kissing Gil? How must it feel when Gil sees Alice when she tries to cheer me up when she bites my cheeks? Even just now-even though I had to chase after Alice- I just left Gil behind when I was kissing him. …Why did I just realise this?_

"Gil. Alice. Both of you are irreplaceable. Alice, you're like the sun to me. And Gil, you're my best friend, my valet. Even though someone like me who doesn't deserve to be in your presence, even though both of you get hurt protecting me, even though my hands couldn't hold onto anything…" Oz shook his head slightly, as images clouded his brain: Father saying he did not care what happens to '_it_', Alice biting his cheek, Gil being slashed by him at the Coming-Of-Age-Ceremony, Alice crying in the Cheshire Cat's dimension, drunken Gil saying for Oz to pay more attention to himself…

And Oz realised he was crying.

He couldn't believe it at first. _When was the last time he had cried?_ That's right, years ago, when Father said he should have never been born. But he had been alone in his room, while Gil was in the cellar being punished because of him. He had never cried in front of Gil or Alice or anybody before. Not ever. If he kept everything to himself, nothing would hurt if everyone left one day.

"Gil…Alice…please don't argue like this. I could never choose between both of you. Because both of you are important to me. Because we're friends." _Because I would be empty without them. _

As Oz finished speaking, Gilbert could only stare numbly at the blond, guilt washing over him like a wave, as Oz rubbed his face with his sleeve, smiling that tiny smile of his. _Why do I always make my master suffer like this?_ "Oz…don't cry." _I don't know what to do if you cry. _The raven knew then he couldn't say anything more to Oz before he made things right. So he turned to Alice.

"Stupid rabbit-no Alice. I'm sorry for yelling at you. I shouldn't have done that."

Alice hadn't intended to make Oz cry. And after Oz's speech and the raven apologising, Alice no longer felt confused. She felt…warm. So in a somewhat gruff tone she said, "Yeah…I guess I can share my manservant with Seaweed Head."

_And now everything is fine again. At this time, at this very moment, things are perfect._

* * *

><p>Elliot ran up one of Lutwidge Academy's many staircases two at a time, focused on getting back to his room ASAP. As he entered his and Leo's room, his train of thoughts stopped, because Leo was waiting for him right there.<p>

"Elliot." Leo's voice was muted, emotionless. Detached. Elliot had the strangest sense of déjà vu, as though he had been transported back in time to the orphanage when he was still getting to know Leo and neither of them had let their guard down just yet.

"Leo..." Not knowing what else to do or say, Elliot held out the books in his arms to Leo. "Here."

Leo looked at the books Elliot was offering. From their titles he could tell that each one was different from the others, from fantasy to humour, drama, angst, all types of books.

"Elliot. what are all these books for?" Leo questioned, keeping his voice level.

"Leo. Even though you've been my valet for a long time, I still don't know what kind of books you like to read…so I just brought a whole stack of them. Leo, I'm sorry I was such a dick to have been reading those kind of..." Elliot's voice trailed off, partially because he had no idea what to say but mostly because of the sheer awkwardness. If only Leo didn't have bangs, otherwise he would be able to at least have some clue about what to do.

Without saying a word, Leo carefully took the books from him and placed it onto his desk.

"Leo-"

_THWACK. _

The youngest Nightray fell ungracefully to the ground, defeated by a chair that his valet had thrown at his head.

"ELLIOT NIGHTRAY. YOU IGNORAMUS JERK! YOU THINK YOU CAN MAKE EVERYTHING RIGHT JUST LIKE THAT? WHERE'S THAT INFAMOUS NIGHTRAY PRIDE YOU ALWAYS HAVE?!"

"YOU DIDN'T NEED TO HIT ME! AND BESIDES WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT ME TO DO, KISS YOUR FEET?!" Elliot shouted back, jumping to his feet.

"Don't quote my words back to me you idiot! You-" As the bickering between the two went on and on, Elliot felt an undercurrent of relief spread throughout his body. The pit of trepidation that had been in his stomach of his valet not forgiving him, avoiding him, had gone. Even as he screamed Leo's shortcomings at the noirette, he understood he had been forgiven by Leo.

"Fine!" Cutting across Leo's venom-laced retort-where he was in turn declaring Elliot's shortcomings to the world-, the young Nightray crossed his arms. "I'll do whatever you want to make it up to you, okay? Just stop yelling your head off, I've got enough problems with you then without that shorty brat and the rest adding on." Elliot huffed. He didn't want to argue so soon with the noirette again. _Best just to take whatever punishment Leo had in mind and suck it up. _

Leo's eyes widened behind his glasses. Had he just heard what he thought he had? Had Elliot finally cracked? Ah, but this _was_ convenient.

A smile playing on his lips, the noirette smugly stated, "It's good you're accepting responsibility Elliot. Very well, as a punishment you have to read out aloud a fanfic that _I_ chose. _And_ while I'm recording it." _Serves you right for criticising me when I read Ero._

Taking a few seconds to enjoy the sight of Elliot sweat-drop and squirm Leo couldn't resist adding on, "The second…is an idea from Lady Sharon Rainsworth~"

_What?_

* * *

><p>"Gil, Alice. We should go and find Sharon-chan and the rest now least they're worrying about us~" Oz cheerfully stated. Now that everything was back to the way it was-or maybe even <em>better<em>- Oz could smile whole-heartedly. "Come on!" the blond shouted, grabbing Gil's hand and Alice's, then turning to-

"Oz wait! Wait! WAIT!" Alice yelled into Oz's ear, loud enough Oz's eardrums nearly split. This of course caused the raven to shoot a dirty look at the brunette, which surprisingly Alice ignored.

"A-Alice? What's wrong? Don't you want to eat?" Oz asked, rubbing his ear.

Alice shook her head. "We can't go find the clown and the others yet!"

Oz stared at Alice. _She was rejecting meat? Come to think of it, Alice looks rather excited._"Alice wha-"

"Because I want to go on a date with you and Seaweed Head!"

* * *

><p>AN: Elliot and Leo finally get some scene time! OAO' I hope Elliot giving Leo books to apologise wasn't too corny.<p>

…On another note, I really hope the Oz crying scene wasn't OOC. I want to try and write more happy things for the PH fandom after all the trauma from the latest chapters.

By the way, anyone want to guess what Sharon's punishment is? 8DD Hint: It's been done in omakes before~


	9. The Mighty Have Fallen

**Chapter 9: The Mighty Have Fallen**

Warning: This chapter is slightly(?) perverted (Elliot's bit), probably a bit OOC, and deals serious blows to Elliot's pride.

* * *

><p>"Underneath my eyes all this time. You were right Xerxes, even when we were playing chess he was sneaking behind my back trying to-"<p>

"Uncle please stop-"

"So...this must be what he was planning all along-"

"Uncle!Stop _it!_" At Ada's distressed voice Oscar stopped his stream of words momentarily, gazing at his niece in concern. They were with Sharon Rainsworth and Xerxes Break who were having tea and listening to Oscar's grief over Vincent Nightray while Ada in turn futilely tried to stop her uncle.

"Uncle, please stop talking about Vincent-sama in that way! It isn't what you think, Vincent-sama was intending from the beginning to get your permission about us, only...!" As Ada faltered, her cheeks flushed as she tried to grasp hold of words that would indirectly say **it**, her uncle shook his head sadly.

"I don't blame you at all Ada. An innocent girl like yourself wouldn't understand how cunning some people can be."

"But-" Ada stopped as her uncle rose up from his chair, looking uncommonly grave. She didn't know how to explain _all_ of this to her uncle when he wasn't his usual jolly self. "No more Ada. I have to return to Pandora now, but rest assured I will get Vincent Nightray to answer to you." With that, Oscar nodded in thanks to Sharon and Break and then left the room. In the enveloping silence, Break understanding the suitation left as well, leaving Sharon and Ada alone in the room.

The silence was broken by Ada whispering, "Why doesn't Uncle understand?"

Sharon simply watched Ada. Since she was older than Ada (even though Ada looked older due to Sharon's contract with Equus) she regarded Ada Vessalius in a younger-sister manner due to Oz, although she had rarely talked to Ada outside of maintaining cordial relationships due to politics.

"Ada-chan," Sharon gently said, "I believe Oscar-sama is only behaving this way out of the concern you may be hurt by Vincent Nightray." Sharon having had first-hand experience of how the bicoloured-eyed man manipulated other people for his own gain, had no doubt there was a more sinister motive behind him seeing Ada Vessalius. "...I am sure that since Oscar-sama regards you as his own daughter, if any harm were to come to you, he would feel to blame-" Here the blonde let out a muffled sob, as she folded her arms and laid her head on the table, shaking slightly. Sharon wisely said no more but laid a comforting hand on Ada's shoulder.

_There's no way Vincent Nightray would start seeing Ada Vessalius without a darker motive than 'love'._

No doubt that thought was on Oscar Vessalius's mind as well.

* * *

><p>Gilbert was thinking deeply about many things. The first was God truly hated him which was actually a given considering Oz had been in the Abyss for ten years before escaping. The second was he needed a cigarette <em>now<em>. But before he got to the '_why_' part, he needed to know _how_.

"Hold on you stupid rabbit. Do you even know what a _date_ is?"

The brunette puffed herself up, brimming with confidence. "Hah! Of course! Earlier on when you fainted Seaweed Head, while Oz was getting you on the bed, I read one of those stories on that square screen thing. And-" Alice did not mince any words- "In the one where all three of us went on this 'date', Seaweed Head patted my head and Oz bought me tons of meat!"

The raven let out a strangulated sound. Why oh why had he patted Alice's head after visiting the place where the first Sealing Stone was kept? Oz smiled. That fanfic didn't sound too bad. It was adorable anyway, how Alice liked Gil patting her head. _Gil's big hands are suited to do it_... "But Alice, I thought you didn't like those fanfics?"

Alice huffed. Really, couldn't they be doing something instead of talking? Those 'stories' she had read sounded exactly like how Oz and Seaweed Head would behave. Exactly. Like. So why couldn't they go on a date already so she could eat her meat? "Well I don't get what being pregnant is," Alice stated bluntly, noticing how Seaweed Head's cheeks suddenly infused with colour and Oz- Were they ill? "Is that an illness? Or having to take care of that clown's baby after I 'gave birth'. Ah-" Inspiration suddenly struck the rabbit. "Oi Seaweed Head! How come that clown was good enough to receive a baby from that dragon and I wasn't?! Seaweed Head!" Alice demanded, yanking at the raven's jacket.

Oz was trembling from barely controlled laughter, and therefore was of absolutely no help to Gilbert, who was feeling faint from blood loss. Not to mention the images conjured up by the thought of the dragon and Break-

_Not. Going. There._

"...Stupid rabbit…I'm going to regret saying this, but can you show us the story you read?" Alice perked up. Seaweed Head was giving up! Soon she would be with her beloved meat. She might even give Oz and the raven some if Gilbert patted her head. "And after that we can go on a date Seaweed Head?!"

"I..." Gilbert slumped a bit, letting Oz tug him in the general direction of **somewhere**. He had no strength left to explain the complications of a date, least of all that you were supposed to have _two_ people not three, for a date. And the fact that one person had to be female, and the other person had to be male. "Yeah...I…no objections…I guess…"

The pen name of the writer was found out to be called _TheLadyHarisen._

* * *

><p>"Elliot, come <em>on, <em>you must be done by now." Leo said, knocking on the bathroom's door. It had already been ten minutes. _Seriously..._

"**No**." Came the somewhat muffled reply, from behind the door. Leo did not bat an eye. _You made your bed, now you better lie on it Elliot._ "I know this is a big blow to your ego level, but think about it, the sooner you get this over with, the sooner you go on to the next stage of your punishment, and the sooner your punishment will end."

"_There's more?_"

"You're already getting off easy compared to the first punishment I had in mind. And that was only because you brought me Lady Moffit's detailed guide on BDSM." Elliot sucked in a breath, then wished he really hadn't. _Too tight...I can't __**breathe**__. _And as for 'Lady Moffit'-well Elliot could barely look the cashier in the eye as he paid for _that_ particular book. It hadn't helped that the cashier had winked at him and had said wistfully, "I remember those days." Elliot had all but fled out of the shop, desperately praying he wouldn't run into anyone he knew.

_If my family could see me now_...

..._They would probably disown me_...

"Elliot. Come out right now, or I'll shoot my gun at the door." Elliot balked at that. Leo's aim was awful to say the very least. Gritting his teeth-he finally knew how Edgar felt when he was surrounded by enemies in a life and death situation- he unlocked the door and wobbly stepped outside. This was how Elliot looked like: He was wearing a traditional French maid dress-long black lace stockings with high-heeled black pointed shoes, a lacy white headband, the dress being covered in frills as well as covered with little black bows, with a large white ribbon tying the whole thing together at the back. In other words, the works with a few additional details added. However, Leo knew what Elliot was wearing _underneath_ the dress was far more satisfying. Three sweet words: Ivory. Black. Underwear.

As Elliot fidgeted on the spot, surreptitiously trying to shake of the lace headband, Leo's grin stretched so wide he looked like he was the living incarnation of a Cheshire Cat. "Suits you well Elliot," the noirette said casually, earning a glare of pure embarrassment from his master. "Now, if you would do the honours~" Leo motioned towards the camera he was holding.

Elliot had never wanted more to throw something more-preferably a bookcase- at his servant. This was Leo's idea of a warped joke, _right_?

"Elliot_._" Hearing the hint of warning in Leo's voice, Elliot knew he wasn't going to escape from this. Besides, he had promised Leo to make it up to him. And Nightrays always kept their promises.

…Even if it meant he had to wear a bag over his head for the next ten years after this was over.

"How-" Elliot choked on the words that seemed to get trapped in his throat "May I serve you M-m-m-" "Yes?" Leo drawled, using the camera to zoom in on Elliot's face.

"Mars-ter-..._master?_"

* * *

><p>As the faithful words that thoroughly broke Elliot Nightray's pride were uttered, Sharon who was listening into Elliot's and Leo's conversation made a pure squeal of delight which translated into fangirl terms would be "Asfjkdsdgsadfl", causing a concerned look from Ada, who had recovered somewhat.<p>

* * *

><p>It was exactly like the last time Pandora had held a meeting. All the four dukes were there, the officals were standing guard in the shadows, the secretaries with their quills were ready, waiting to record the meeting. And yet none of them seemed to want to broach the reason why they had all gathered here. Oscar was absorbed in his thoughts, Duke Nightray was poker-faced, while Rufus was attentively listening to Cheryl's whims. Reim stood behind them. For possibly the first time, he wished he was off doing paperwork instead of-<p>

After Rufus had gotten K.O-ed by Cheryl's harisen (for making a suggestive statement), the elderly lady rapped her harisen against the table.

"Well! It's high time we begun, shall we?~"

As the four (two dukes actually as Rufus was MIA and wasn't Cheryl a woman?) dukes began to discuss, an offical of Pandora whispered to another, "It's begun. They're discussing the latest threat to Pandora- the threat of 'Fanfiction'."

* * *

><p>AN: This originally had a sort-of plot. But then I got side-tracked. In case anyone was wondering why Elliot and Leo haven't been attending their lessons, it's because Sharon blackmailed the headmaster of Lutwidge Academy. *nods*<p> 


	10. Retrospect

**Chapter 10:** **Retrospect**

* * *

><p>"It has come to our certain attention," Lady Sheryl said, rapping her harisen against the table to keep anyone else from talking, "That certain people of an unknown motive are sowing discord among our families." Here a murmuring broke out, only to stop when Sheryl smiled sweetly. "They are operating via the internet. However, some of you may be asking, exactly <em>how<em> they are causing a threat? The answer is simple-"

"Oh she's good," a Pandora official whispered to the other officer besides him. Truly Sheryl Rainsworth deserved the title of 'The Strongest' in Pandora. The other officer nodded and replied with "I heard she trained Xerxes Break from young as well. I hear the youngest Nightray worships him." "For real? I wonder what she must have taught him." "I guarantee you its witchcraft. It's obvious from the fact how Rufus-sama hangs onto her every word despite being rejected every single time for _years_." And the Pandora agents continued to gossip, as they were tired of being reduced to being extras that were all middle-aged balding gormless men whose only purpose were to be killed off by Jun. (Reim being the exception.)

Now back to Lady Sheryl."-Oscar-san so far is the first person to be gravely affected by their actions." Sheryl said, waving a hand in the blond's direction. Oscar Vessalius truly looked-pardon the coarse language- royally _pissed off. _There were signs of course. Besides looking at Bernard Nightray in the way you would find a slug stuck on your shoe, the blond was holding in his hands what seemed to be a roughly-crafted wooden doll with a piece of scrap paper that had the words 'Vincent Nightrat' stapled on its head. And if you really wanted solid evidence of Oscar's ill feelings towards said blond, some (actually almost of all them) of the pins jabbed in the doll were stabbed in between a _very_ private part of the doll's legs.

Lady Sheryl cleared her throat. "Oscar-san, will you be willing to explain in _detail_ exactly what happened?" She had no great liking of Vincent Nightray after him mistreating her granddaughter, but keeping up appearances were needed. If the bastard ever approached her however, it would be a different story.

"Certainly, Lady Sheryl." With that, Oscar stood up, and simply stared at Bernard Nightray. After ten long seconds, the duke launched himself into saying "In just a few of these fanfics I read, I found Vincent Nightray doing things only a husband should do to my niece. I demand justice." Oscar then sat down, pointedly ignoring the Nightray Duke, and everyone else who was waiting for him to continue.

Sheryl exchanged a look with Rufus, who had recovered (unfortunately). While Ru-kun was clingy, there was a reason they had stayed friends all these years-they understood how the other thought, although in Rufus's case there were more than a few screws loose. _What was Ru-kun playing at? _ Even though the red-headed duke was the one who had arranged this meeting and Sheryl was playing along, it was a farce and Rufus had nothing to gain from. Reim had shakily informed her about how few writers wrote about her and Rufus together, but surely the duke couldn't be that petty..._actually he is, but not in that way...hopefully._ Sheryl sighed, deciding to get the truth out of Rufus via her trusty harisen after the meeting was over. "With all due respect Oscar-san, what has this got to do with the matter on hand?"

Oscar was out of his seat in an instance, nearly flying across the table, pointing an accusatory finger at the Nightray Duke. "My innocent niece Ada was polluted by that snake with a brother complex Vincent Nightray!" The Pandora agents duly wrote this down as it was their job, giving one another a Look.

Bernard Nightray barely flicked an eye, choosing to take a sip of wine from a glass. "Watch your words Oscar Vessalius. Vincent is part of our household, and I won't let you smear the name of our dukedom any more than you already have. Your foolish niece must definitely be at least partially to blame for this."

"Nonsense! Ada-"

"While thou's actions hast amuse me," Rufus broke in, "Perhaps 'tis time we move on to the heart of the matter, yes?" the red-headed duke then somehow stepped onto to the table without jumping, taking his time walking to the centre as a) to be the centre of attention and b) so everyone could admire his high-heeled shoes which _never_ _got admired_. "The people who orchestrated this plan…is none other than the elusive Baskervilles." Now that he had everyone's full attention, Rufus smirked, bringing out his fan to cover half of his face. "I see many of your faces hold doubt…let me enlighten thee. It is indeed a nefarious plan, is it not? But there is no doubt. In order to distract us from finding and protecting the Sealing Stones, they have employed this underhanded method to stall us, and drive a wedge between the four dukedoms."

"…What proof do you have, Duke Barma?" Oscar said, drumming his fingers on the table impatiently. God, he needed a drink. It didn't matter even if the Baskervilles were responsible for the horror (which he had glimpsed briefly but was burnt into his mind). He would hunt down Vincent. _…I think the main estate still has my hunting rifles which I stored away?_

How cynical, Oscar Vessalius. I have…certain resources which are accurate. Anyone with a shred of common sense can tell this is the Baskervilles' doing. Pandora has no other enemies. Furthermore, I have acquired knowledge on a certain Charlotte Baskerville from Elliot Nightray's and your own nephew's account. She is exactly the type of woman who would stoop this ow."

"Putting it that way it does sort of make sense…"

"There aren't any other people who would do such a thing, and they're only targeting the households of the four dukes…"

"Surely Duke Barma's words can be trusted…"

"Then what do you suggest we do, Barma?" Bernard Nightray said abruptly, silencing the discussion. "Short of banning the internet, which is a valuable source of collecting information."

Rufus resisted rolling his eyes, or stamping his foot. He could make an indent in this table with his shoe's heel, but that was beside the point. "…There is nothing we can do to stop them, Nightray. 'Tis best to regard them with disdain, for surely their efforts will wear off soon enough, or at least proceed in the proper way." _In other words we can do nothing, fools._

* * *

><p>Gilbert risked another glance at Alice and Oz. Sure, they were supposed to be taking a break from finding the rabbit's memories (being used as bait, being attacked by Chains and nearly getting killed for what-the seventh time now? did drain your energy.) But it couldn't be healthy to be glued to that small screen right? No use. Both of them were crowded around the small laptop screen on the bed, with Alice occasionally jabbing at a certain part on the screen and asking Oz and him things like "Seaweed Head, why do you think of Oz when you're showering and doing things with your hands?" or "Does the stupid clown want to bone Sharon?" which led to "Does the clown want to feed her?" which eventually led to "Does the clown want eat that woman?" that made Gil want to throw himself off a convenient cliff. "Give it to me straight Oz. How bad is it?"<p>

Oz's eyes flicked up from the screen to see Gil rigidly sitting on the edge of the bed puffing on a cigarette as thought it was his lifeline. "Don't be so cynical Gil, the fanfic Alice read earlier is actually quite sweet. It had nothing 'mature' in it."

Gilbert stared at the blond, chewing on the edge of the cigarette in distress. "Sweet? Do you have any idea how _sick_ these people are? They _stalk_ us. They could be watching us_ right now_. That's a crime Oz! Haven't they heard of platonic friendship before? They-" Gilbert broke off when a horrifying thought hit him. Did they watch the trio when they were sleeping? Did they-did they take pictures of Oz? His precious master was being spied on when he was _asleep_? And even the stupid rabbit too-how could they spy on a girl? No matter how greedy she was when it came to food the rabbit was a girl. A _girl_! Wait if these people could stoop so low did that mean they watched Oz/Alice when they were changing or _showering_-

And then it got worse when Break slid out underneath the bed. "What are you brats up to now, hmm?" _And then_ the albino had to quickly swing himself onto a chair to avoid the lamp thrown at him by Gilbert. It was obviously a vicious cycle to make Gilbert's life as miserable as possible. "What. Are. You. Doing here Break?"

Break rolled his eye, tsking at the raven. "My my, so cold~~~! I have to admit Gilbert-kun, I never thought you would have the guts to seduce anyone but your beloved _young_ master, and that took long enough. I sense quite an unhealthy obsession going on here~"

Glancing at Oz, who was trying to wake up Alice who had fallen asleep a while ago (assured her property was safe) Gilbert edged his body between them and Break. It wasn't like Break would attack them, but the raven had a duty-_even more now_- to protect his master and the stupid rabbit. "What do you mean Break?"

Break scoffed, leaning back while popping a candy into his mouth. "Tell me Gilbert-kun, have you read the newspaper of late? Or were you distracted by reading literature of a questionable nature, hmm? Here is the article then~" With that, Break fished out from one of his pockets a rather crumpled newspaper, and tossing it in the direction of the raven.

The headlines screamed: Lutwidge Academy Taken A Turn For The Worse? Directly next to it was a rather harried picture of Gil running with Oz in tow. Below it was the summary:_ One-if not the most-of the esteemed schools in the country, may have taken a rather darker nature in teaching their students. According to reliable eyewitnesses, a black haired man around his mid-twenties with golden eyes was seen behaving suggestively to a group of female students who were no doubt hanging on to his every word. More shockingly, he was dressed in a student uniform, which beguils the worringly question where or who he got it from. In another case, he was forcefully dragging a young blond boy away from his classmates, with the ominous words "Let's settle this someplace quieter!" Continued on page four…_

"So what do you have to say for yourself Gilbert-kun?" Break purred, seeing the raven had all but stopped breathing. Turning to page four, Gilbert lost what little colour he had retained in his face. "B-Break, it says I was wearing no clothes while running after Oz!"

The albino flapped his sleeves nonchalantly at the raven in response. S_o it looks like all of them have settled their differences. Sharon will be pleased._ "Oh, you know how the rumours go Gilbert-kun~ It might be a good idea to lay low for awhile, at least for a day or two..." _Until my lady has finished her preparations. _

Gilbert was about to protest when a hand clamped down onto his shoulder. "Say Gil, wouldn't it be a good time to go on a date with Alice now?" Oz drawled, his left eyebrow twitching. _How __**dare**__ Gil seduce so many girls without my permission? If only Ada's cats were here I would make him beg for mercy. _"Alice!" Oz said, looking over his shoulder as he steered Gil towards the door, as the brunette was peering curiously at the laptop's screen. "It's time to go now! Unless you want to keep Break company~" Alice all but choked at that, scurrying away from the clown to join Oz and Gil.

Break smiled as he lay down on the previously occupied bed, reaching for the laptop. Considering Pandora was on a wild goose hunt regarding fanfiction, it was as good as time as any to slack. With that, Break blinked at what he saw on the screen, the words blurrily titled: PH KINK MEME. Scrolling down, Break could only whistle at what he saw, while covering Emily's head with one hand, for "Ah, bondage? This is too hardcore for even you Emily~" And then- "Hohhh, what an accurate drawing of Gil on his knees for Oz-kun~"

* * *

><p>"Oz-"<p>

"Yes Alice?"

"_Oz-_"

"I _know_ Alice."

The brunette in question was all but quivering in joy, as her eyes settled on the buffet table which was weighed down by food, even as the trio were escorted to their table by a waiter. After sneaking out of Lutwidge academy via the original secret passage they had come through, they had gone to town. Deciding to keep to his word, Oz had brought Alice to the nearest 'All you can eat' restaurant. It was something Gilbert was regretting, since the stupid rabbit seemed to have no concept of dining etiquette_ at all_, and as they procceded to line up at the buffet counter, he tried in vain to stop her grabbing the food with her bare hands, which made the cook inside the raven shudder.

"Look stupid rabbit, you use the tongs or spoon to scoop food onto your plate and you don't grab it with your hands even if-_especially_ if you're wearing gloves, for God's sake do you know how unhygienic that is? And you can't just take all the meat available here just because it's a buffet there are other people including me and Oz who want to eat it as well-_stop!_ You can't just lick the icing from the top of a cake and then put it back! You-" To which point Alice got fed up, and stuffed the half-eaten meat she had been eating-See! She was kind enough to offer him meat!- to shut Gilbert up and returning to where Oz was stuffing himself with cake.

"Oi Oz, Seaweed Head," Alice said, after deeming her belly was full for the moment, and then planting her legs on the table. "What's the difference between biting cheeks and biting you on the lip? That woman explained it to me, but I don't understand."

"That's because you're stupid," Gilbert muttered, feeling sore from the meat-bone Alice had stuffed into his mouth. Could you catch germs from a Chain? _Heathen_. Seeing Oz's pout though, Gilbert reminded himself this was supposed to be a bit more special than their normal outings, since it was a _date_, even if felt like he was babysitting Alice.

It was good to see Oz truly smiling.

"What Gil means," Oz said, "Is you messed up a bit what kissing means you seeeee~ Kissing is when you press your lips to another person's lips and then you just kiss them. But Alice is adorable either way so I don't mind~"_ No way in hell I'm going to be explaining furthermore than that here, least Gil gets a heart attack. _

Alice though about this, while grabbing a cupcake to munch on. "So that's kissing huh? I like my method better," she mumbled with her mouth full. _But just to be on the safe side!_ "Oz!" Shifting herself, so her face was an inch or two away from the blond. "I want to try it on you. Open up manservant!"

Oz kicked Gilbert under the table as Alice looked at him. The last thing he wanted was for the whole restaurant to be staring at them. And well, he didn't mind kissing Alice, especially when Alice was looking just that little bit nervous to be endearing. Since he was sitting right next to Alice-actually they were since the restaurant's chairs were like a curved mini-couches, he gently pressed his lips against hers, before slipping inside the brunette's warm mouth. It didn't last more than a few seconds, but Oz didn't regret it.

"Oz tastes sweet but kind of salty," Alice said aloud, pressing her fingers to her lips as she pondered the warm feeling that was spreading inside her. That kiss was nothing like the one she had done to Oz when they had contracted, this was...Alice didn't know how to explain it, except she felt happier now. She then squirmed across the seat to get to him Gilbert, who had an odd look on his face. "Seaweed Head, now it's your turn!"

_They look cute together, _Gilbert thought wistfully. Once again Vincent's warnings about the B-Rabbit rang through his head. It was true Vincent's words made sense. But he just _couldn't _do that to Alice, even more so now that he had promised Oz.

Until Gilbert realised that the rabbit's face was fast approaching his and she was about to oh shit oh shit-"Stop!" the raven yelled, grabbing hold of the brunette's head to stop her advancing. "You can't do that to me stupid rabbit!" Gilbert shrieked and dear god why had she wriggled herself onto his _lap_ and why wasn't Oz doing anything help me Oz-

"Why not?" Alice said, trying to get closer to Gilbert's face. "Are you scared Seaweed Head? Or-" Alice recalled something she had read from a fanfic and went limp, staring at the raven's face in awe. "Are you _really_ that good Seaweed Head? That story me and Oz read said that during the ten years Oz was in the Abyss you kissed and laid with a lot of people including the clown to vent your pent-up sexual frustration-"

Gilbert groaned, hanging his head. "Those are all lies Alice...and you can't kiss me, guys are supposed to kiss girls and you should save it for someone you care for." _Like Oz._

Alice thought about Gilbert's words. Someone she cared for...did Seaweed Head mean kindred spirits? Hah, that must be it! That's what the stupid raven was actually trying to say, but he was acting...what was the word again...tsu...tsukune about it, just like in the stories Alice had read earlier! "But Seaweed Head, you're Oz's manservant so you're my second servant, which means you have to obey me! So I order you to open up!"_  
><em>

"Oz," Gilbert sputtered, looking at the blond for help, only to gulp when Oz very pointedly gave him a look which said _get on with it._

"Well-um- just once okay stupid rabbit?" Alice nodded impatiently, before leaning up and kissing Gilbert. This time Alice was the one in control, exploring Gilbert's mouth. The raven swallowed hard, holding Alice in position as he kissed her back, petting her hair as he did so.

Oz could feel his heartbeat speeding up as he watched Gil and Alice. _No wonder Sharon-chan ships people... _"Alice, how did it feel?" Oz enquired, as the two broke apart, Gilbert's face heavily flushed as he quickly wiped his mouth.

Alice shook her head, as she climbed off the raven's lap and reached for a piece of chicken to eat. "Nah, Seaweed Head's not so good, stick to patting my head!"

* * *

><p>AN: Why must kissing scenes be hard to write I can't do it X_X<p> 


	11. Staph it's too gay

**Chapter 11: Staph it's too gay**

* * *

><p>"Leo...so what do you want me to do?" Elliot asked, twitching underneath the noirette's steady gaze. Tch, how did women breathe in corsets? How did they <em>walk<em>? No wonder they stood around gossiping all day, they must be talking about is how uncomfortable their dresses were. _Focus Elliot._ At least Leo is talking to you now, Elliot told himself grimly. That was worth it dressing as a damn girl, even if he really wasn't comfortable. Even though those fanfics weren't exactly _his_ fault.

"Elliot," came the quiet voice.

"Yes Leo?" Elliot said, feeling somewhat relieved Leo wasn't making him call Leo master but god he was disgracing the name of the Nightrays by wearing this dress he would really have to do some soul-searching once he had made up entirely to Leo- "Put this on." Something covered in brown curls landed on Elliot's lap. _A wig? _Elliot frowned as he turned it over in his hands, sneaking a glance at Leo. _Why did Leo give me this-ah. Oh. _"Y-you want me to wear this Leo?" Elliot said weakly, swallowing audibly. Sure Leo was his best friend and all but wasn't this taking it a bit too far? _By a bit was already screwed when I put on this dress. God if the shorty sees me in this dress…_

"I'm doing this for your sake Elliot. This way no one will recognise you. Now come, we're going to be late for dinner." Leo pushed up his glasses, securing them in place before he yanked Elliot to his feet, clicking his tongue in disapproval as he adjusted the wig, unable to successfully smirk at sight of Elliot in drag. Really he should have done this a long time ago. "Let's go."

* * *

><p>"Ojou-sama! Would you care for a sweet? Or perhaps a lollipop or two? I'll even let you pet Emily~" Break sang out, as he entered the small but cosy terrace, which overlooked one of Lutwidge Academy's many rose gardens. He had left Sharon here drinking tea while he had went off to disturb the trio, and the albino was now in a <em>very<em> good mood, now that he enough fodder for blackmail for a lifetime from the fanfics/fanarts.

Until he spotted Sharon rocking in a corner.

"Fu fu~"

"My lady?"

"Fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu~"

"Ojou-sama-"

"Fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu-yes, what is it Break?" Sharon said sweetly, turning her head to examine the suddenly on guard albino.

"…Ah, it's is nothing my lady. I just came here to deliver the good news that Oz-kun has settled his problems with Gilbert–kun and Alice-kun, just like I predicted~" Break flopped himself onto the abandoned tea table, picking through the leftover cakes on the plates, before wilting slightly at the solemn, inescapable fact that his lady had eaten all his favourite snacks. _One of these days I'll get proof of my lady's sweet tooth._

Sharon sighed a bit before joining Break, wondering how she was going to put it. She hadn't told Break all the details-Grandmother had advised against that- but just enough so it would surprise Xerx-Nii san too. She couldn't let his ego get any bigger after all. "Break, have you heard of Founder's Day here at Lutwidge Academy?"

"Hmmm?" Break paused in the middle of eating a strawberry lollipop, which dangled forlornly out of his mouth as he glanced over at Sharon. "It's the day the school was built isn't it? All the students get to go home that day for a break or something like that I believe." Perhaps he could steal-ah _borrow_ his lady's camera to take a photo of Sharon in the act. It would be ironic at the very least.

"Yes, you are correct Break. Normally it is celebrated on January 27th, but thanks to Gilbert-sama's-" Sharon cleared her throat here-honestly what was the man doing when he already had Oz and now Alice she would have to teach Alice how to use a harisen to make the pitiful man on his knees soon-"_Questionable_ actions, it has been moved up to tomorrow so they can catch Gilbert-sama in the act. However, that is just a pretext. _It_ will be held tomorrow."

Break nodded, not really hearing his lady's words. Taking his lady's camera might just be too risky after all. Sharon's harisen _hurt_. Perhaps he could blackmail Gilbert-kun or someone else to do it for him?

"Ada-sama has also agreed to help me with the props. Surprisingly she is also quite knowledgeable of Lutwidge Academy's secret passages-Break are you listening?"

"Yes my lady~" Yes, threatening to show some rather embarrassing drawings of Oz-kun on his knees to Pandora and such should convince Gilbert enough.

"Repeat everything I said Break."

"Mmm, you mentioned something about Gilbert-kun embarrassing himself as usual-oh look at the time! Gotta poof~ Goodbye and goodnight my lady~" Break flung himself under the table to escape, sensing his lady's dangerous aura.

"Break! It's not even 7:30pm yet, don't think you can escape like that! You-oh." Sharon felt a headache coming on when she yanked up the tablecloth that was _not_ hiding a certain troublesome albino.

"Good grief…"

* * *

><p>"When did you transfer?"<p>

"Kyaaa! You have such pretty long flowing hair!"

"What shampoo do you use?"

"Do you have any brothers?"

"_L-Leo_…_help_…" Elliot strangled out, as he was cornered by an assortment of Lutwidge's Fine Ladies, all who were squealing about the new transfer student, Eleanor Nightray.

"Leo? Who's that?"

"Don't tell me! You must have a beau outside the Academy~"

"Wait! C-could it be? Is it the handsome dreamy dark haired man that everyone gossiping about?"

"Kyaa! That must be it! It all fits, Eleanor-san arriving at the same _he_ reappeared~ It must be forbidden love~"

_It really worked, _Leo thought from a safe distance, as he watched Elliot squirm. With Elliot's hair securely tucked underneath the wig, and Elliot forced to speak in a high pitch tone and minding his words (due to the utter shame it would bring down on the Nightray family if one of their sons was found crossdressing), so far the disguise seemed to be working. And Elliot's embarrassed face was lovely to see.

"Leo!" Leo nodded in response to the approaching trio, but kept his eyes on Elliot. What a pity he didn't have anything to record this moment-Ah, he had forgotten. Lutwidge Academy had cameras in the halls, dining area and classrooms didn't they? Perhaps he could find a way after all~

Oz looked around as he reached Leo. Elliot didn't seem nearby. Had the two made up? "Leo," Oz began cautiously, waving a hand at Gilbert to go after Alice who had spotted food. "Have you seen Elliot? He's been looking for you to apologise…he's really sorry about everything you know, Leo?" Oz trailed off awkwardly, not knowing how Leo would take it.

"Mmmhh. Don't worry Oz-kun, I've already spoken to Elliot~ Everything's fine now. In fact, Elly's somewhere here. Can you spot him Oz-kun?"

"Really?" The blond brightened up. Gil and Alice had settled aside their differences (for now anyway, which counted) and Leo and Elliot were good too! He could finally slack~

"Do you have any other beaus, Eleanor-chan? You must be very popular~"

_Who's…who's THAT? _Oz had noticed a group of Lutwidge students gathered nearby, but he had paid them no attention once he had spotted Leo. Now however, they parted to reveal a blushing girl, slightly taller than him with soft brown curls lining her face.

…It was clear to Oz, that the brunette was an adorable helpless-damsel-waiting-for-her-knight (in this case a lost new student) and it was _obviously_ his duty as a gentleman to show her around.

"For the last time…I really don't have any relationship with that guy…" Elliot tried in vain again to dissuade the other students, but they just wouldn't _listen_. Tch. Leo better be enjoying himself, because Elliot had had enough. Screw decorum, politics and whatnot, he was going to just pull off this damn wig-

"It must be fate..!"

No. Please, _no_. Not when I'm like this-

Elliot made a choking sound when Oz knelt down on one leg, with a hand placed over his heart and the other gently holding Elliot's hand. "To meet such a beautiful girl like you today…there is no other possible answer." Brushing his lips against the brunette's hand; to be honest her hand felt rather calloused than soft-maybe she was trained in swordplay?- Oz went on to say, "I would be honoured if you would let me escort you around the Academy…"

_The shorty is touching me he's touching me Leo's watching-wait, I can use this. _"Hurry up then sho-I mean, kind sir."

Oz twitched. Had she been about to call him 'shorty'? She was only a little bit taller than him! But she was really pretty…and familiar too. Had Oz seen her before? Tugging her away from the other dreamy classmates, Oz quickly glanced at Gil and Alice. Well they were squabbling over Alice's bad manners now…Oz led Eleanor away. Once they were outside the dining room however, Eleanor stopped walking, gripping Oz's hand firmly to prevent him from continuing on.

"Eh? Is there something wrong-ouch!" Oz groaned as he doubled over, the brunette having hit him _hard_ in the stomach. "What was that for-" Oz stopped talking mid-way, his eyes widening as Eleanor _yanked off her hair_, to reveal a very familiar head underneath- "Unbelievable shorty. To think you have the time to go chasing other girls when you already have that girl called Alice by your side! Do you have no shame-"

"_Elliot_," Oz gasped, utterly shell-shocked. "So…you're a _girl_?" On impulse, the blond reached forward a hand to touch the other's chest, to better feel it, and was thusly rewarded with another punch in the stomach.

"THE HELL YOU'RE DOING SHORTY!" Elliot's outburst was enough to draw Gilbert's and Alice's attention who had once again gone looking for Oz. _Honestly I should get Pandora to install a tracking device on Oz_, Gilbert thought ruefully, before he slammed to a halt at the sight of Elliot-of all people- dressed in _drag_ with Oz quavering on the ground. The sight alone was enough to bring back Gilbert's own horrendous time as 'Lady Gilbertine", which caused the raven's knees to join Oz's on the floor.

Why are they on their knees, Alice lazily wondered, while polishing off the last of the meat she had snatched when Gilbert wasn't looking. If they were grovelling for food, shouldn't they go back to the dining place? Point blank, the brunette didn't like seeing her manservants for other people. It made her throat feel tight and her stomach weird, like she had eaten a piece of rotten meat. " Oi Oz, Seaweed Head get up," Alice demanded, as she elbowed the guy who wearing a dress-Elliot or something who smelled weird- out of the way, yanking on Gilbert's jacket strings.

"That's enough stupid rabbit…" Gilbert said, weakly standing up, pulling Oz up with him, before shivering at the sight of Elliot who despite his girly appearance looked royally pissed off. "Elliot. I have to ask. Did Lady Sharon get a hold of you?"

"You mean Sharon Rainsworth? Tch. Leo made me wear this getup," Elliot huffed, a light blush staining his cheeks even as he scowled. Of course his useless cowardly foster brother had to see him like this. Of _course_. "I'm going back to change now. I would advise you and shorty to leave Gilbert, and stop wearing the goddamn student uniform at your age." Elliot then proceeded to stalk away in high heels and all.

"…Did that just happen Gil?" Oz said, who was dabbing away tears. Ah, it was too good to be true after all…

"Afraid so Oz…" Gilbert mumbled as he lit a cigarette, to calm down."We should retire Oz, it's getting late now and we have to return to Pandora early tomorrow morning."

"Okay, okay Gil. So we'll go back to our room and Alice-you're staying with Sharon-chan right?"

"Yeah that women Sharon said to stay with her tonight." Why couldn't she sleep in the same room with Oz and Seaweed Head? It wasn't fair that she had to be away from them…Alice bit her lip, trying to convince herself it was fine.

"Awww Alice, don't look like that." Oz reached out a hand, thinking to ruffle her hair to cheer her up, before pausing and turning to Gil. "Hey Gil, pat Alice's head. Your hands are bigger so they feel more comforting."

"You don't need to phrase it like _that_ Oz," Gilbert mumbled exasperatedly, nevertheless following Oz's instructions and stiffly patting the brunette's soft hair, as the trio began walking back, with Gil arguing "Can I stop now stupid rabbit?" and Alice replying "No you can't Seaweed Head! Keep petting until I'm satisfied!" whilst Oz said nothing, simply smiling contentedly.

* * *

><p>"Did you enjoy your time with Oz-sama and Gilbert-sama today?" Sharon said, as she brushed Alice's hair. Sharon sometimes wished she had hair as long and soft as Alice's, but such hair required much patience and time to maintain, and Sharon would rather spend time reading the latest volume of Lady Sylvie and Her Mongrels. Therefore, since the brunette unfortunately didn't care much about her own hair, Sharon would content herself with taking care of Alice's silky hair.<p>

"Yeah, they took me to something called a buffet, where I could eat as much meat as I wanted Sharon!" Alice felt a small shiver run down her spine as the grip on her hair tightened considerably, and that deceivingly sweet voice said, "What did you miss out Alice-san..?"

"Nothing Sharon onne-sama!" _Please don't make me wear a dress or even worse play 'dress up' please oh please-_

Luckily, Sharon seem satisfied with Alice's amendment, as she combed through the rest of the brunette's tangles without any hitch, making small talk about which fashions were 'in' now, as she thought that Alice needed more to know what ladies of her age talked about. _It was so lovely to spoil Alice-san in this way, like Alice was actually her little sister, that she could share her problems and happiness with, _Sharon mused."Ah, it's really late Alice-san! We ought to go to sleep now. You take this bed, and I'll move to the other one." Sharon scrambled over to the nearby bed, feeling flustered just being nestled _thisclose_ next to Alice, before turning off the lights.

"Okay…goodnight then Sharon onne-sama," Alice said all too gratefully, fluffing the pillows on the spacious bed before curling up into a ball to get comfortable.

"…Alice-san?" Sharon began hesitatingly, staring up at the blank ceiling.

"Yes…"

"May I ask, is everything fixed with Oz-sama and Gilbert-sama now?" Sharon had to know. Not out of nosiness as Xerx-Nii would tease, but because it was her duty as Alice's appointed big sister to know. It had absolutely nothing to do with how cute (and frustrating) she found the trio's relationship. _A tragic love-triangle indeed…_

"Huh?! Uh…yeah! Everything is better now...yeah…" Alice trailed off, feeling uncomfortable with where the conversation was leading. But everything _was_ better now. It was just the way Oz and Seaweed Head got along so well with each other, that it made Alice feel left out, although of course Oz was hopeless in that manner, always caring for other people. Which was fine of course. Only, if he paid more attention which was his due as Alice's manservant she would like that.

"So that's it Alice-san! I'll definitely help you."

"W-what? I didn't say anything!" Alice protested. She hadn't said that aloud had she?

"I'll tell you about the details about it tomorrow then Alice-san~ Goodnight!" Sharon turned over to her side, away from the mystified rabbit smiling to herself. _Tomorrow's going to be a perfect day. Nothing will ruin it._

* * *

><p>"Oz, wake up. Wake up <em>now<em>." Oz groaned in protest as a hand shook his shoulder firmly, preventing him from going back to sleep. Blurrily glancing at the window, Oz could tell the sun wasn't even up yet, so why was Gil waking him up at this unholy hour?

"Nnngh…Gilwhatisit? I'm still sleepy…"

"It's Alice, Sharon and Leo. They've been taken captive by the Baskervilles."

AN: I couldn't resist the title or fem!Elliot's name (although I know other fans like to call fem!Leo Lenora) …I'm not sorry.


	12. Bonds

**Chapter 12: Bonds**

* * *

><p>Oz knew what fear was. Up to date, the few times he had really felt it (<em>the sheer sickening sense of nausea and emptiness it gave him<em>), was when the Baskervilles had dropped him into the Abyss and thereafter, when he thought Gilbert had died from the wound the Cheshire cat had gave him, when he saw Alice's dead body in the Cheshire cat's lair, when he had met the memory of Glen Baskerville in Sablier…

Not so few after all then.

And now he was feeling it again, with Gil's words ringing in his ears. Oz sat straight in an instant, emerald eyes concentrated on the raven. Gil would never joke about this sort of thing. Which meant that for all he knew, Alice, Sharon and Leo could be at their captor's whims or heavily injured or even dead now _Alice_-

Oz didn't understand. Why did the Baskervilles had to appear _now _of all times? Everything had been almost _normal_. What with the discovery of fanfiction and the use of it to torment Elliot and Gil too, Oz had been grateful for this lull of peacefulness, and having it shattered so easily- "Gil," Oz spoke softly as he got off the bed, almost as he was afraid someone would overhear their conversation, "How do you know the Baskervilles took them? Do Elliot and Break know?" Gilbert handed Oz the piece of creased scrap paper he had found in the centre of the room Alice and Sharon had shared. "No Oz…I came straight back here after I couldn't find the stupid rabbit or Sharon." Gilbert's left hand curled into a fist, hating himself for letting his guard down. Stupid stupid stupid. And now the stupid rabbit was in extreme danger now, and even Sharon and Elliot's servant were caught up into this mess.

He couldn't look Oz in the eye now.

_"To my darling little boy~ I've persuaded several of your dearest friends to come and have a chat-even us Baskervilles do get a bit lonely for other people's company~ Do come and find us okayyyyy? But don't dilly-dally you hear my boy? Otherwise things will get a little bit messy for your now indisposed friends~" -Big Sis _

"Something's wrong with this letter Gil," Oz said as he turned the paper over, hoping to find some sort of clue or hint to where the Baskerville's location was. No luck. "I mean they could have come after us directly instead of playing this cat-and-mouse game. Or is it because of Jack? But how did they sneak up on Alice, Sharon-chan and Leo? Alice couldn't use her powers since you're sealing them with Raven, but Sharon has Equus…" _Maybe 'Big Sis' poisoned either Alice or Sharon and forced the other one to go along with her to cooperate, like they did to Ada last time._ _Same with Leo too…but why take Leo? Do the Baskervilles hold a grudge against him from last time? _"Gil?" Oz glanced at the raven, only to realise the raven was avoiding Oz's gaze.

"Hey Gil, don't look like that." Oz slipped his hand into Gil's, uncurling the fist the raven had made, noticing how Gil was trembling slightly. "I'm sure Alice and the rest are fine for now-I would feel it if anything happened to Alice." The blond squeezed Gil's hand, hoping to reassure him. _It's not your fault._ "And this time you're by my side Gil. All we need to do is find Break, and we can send the Baskervilles packing~"

Hearing his master speak like this made Gilbert feel a hot lump in his throat, making it hard to swallow. Why was it always Oz taking care of him? It should be the other way around, _he_ was Oz's servant. "Sorry for being so weak Oz," Gilbert mumbled, using his spare hand to caress that beloved face. "I-"

"Gilbert! Shorty! Have you seen Leo anywhere?" Elliot was panicking. After he had returned to their room last night, Leo had just smiled knowingly at him and teasingly waved a video camera, before simply ignoring Elliot in favour of reading one of the books Elliot had bought him. And as for the young Nightray-well, he had just gone to sleep to get the wretched day over as soon as possible, after ripping off the wig and dress in favour for a pair of jeans and a comfortable baggy shirt.

Exchanging a look with Oz, Gilbert stepped forward cautiously, debating what he should say. "Elliot…I don't know how to put this but Leo-"

"Leo isn't still angry, is he? Tch, the stupid idiot! I'm going to give him a wake-up punch when I find him, he's following in your footsteps shorty." Worry was giving way to anger, something Elliot found much easier to deal with. Everything was back to normal last night wasn't it? So why was Leo still acting hurt! He was the one who had to wear a _dress-_"Elliot, Leo's been taken by the Baskervilles."

_What? _Elliot had heard Gilbert wrong. He had to have. The Baskervilles had no grudge against Leo_-but they wouldn't give a damn about that, would they? _

"…Where are they." Elliot gritted his teeth, his fingers twitching to withdraw his sword from his bag. How had the Baskervilles gotten Leo, when he had been in the same room as Elliot had been? Elliot hadn't had any nightmares last night, so he should have woken up if someone had forcefully entered. Maybe it was that puppeteer Baskerville girl. Screw the details, they didn't matter now.

"We're not sure. They've got Alice and Sharon-chan too, so me and Gil decided it would be best to find Break first so he can help." Oz said, feeling a tinge of worry at Elliot knowing the truth. Elliot wasn't even a Contractor; he wouldn't stand a chance. "Elliot, until we know more, maybe you should just wait here-"

"Don't be so stupid shorty!" Elliot spat, striding forward to push aside Gilbert to grab Oz by the collar, lifting the shorter blond up by a few inches. "I don't have a shitty self-sacrifice complex like you do, there's no way in hell I will abandon my valet to the likes of the Baskervilles 'to keep myself safe'!"

"Elliot don't grab Oz like that!" Gilbert grabbed Elliot's arm, forcing him to let go of Oz. "Look I know you're worried over Leo, but you shouldn't be arguing with Oz! Listen, our top priority now is to find Break, so we can rescue the stupid rabbit and the others."

"Tch." Elliot glared at the raven, before taking a deep breath and reigning in his anger-for now anyway. "We better hurry then, it's been hours."

* * *

><p>"We're wasting time," Elliot said, as they once again traipsed up one of Lutwidge's corridors, looking in vain for the slightest hint of snowy white hair. None of them were split up for safety reasons, and it was slow going exploring the huge school. The trio had not met any students or teachers-Elliot had said that it was a holiday today, which was probably why the Baskervilles had decided to make their move. "By now the Baskervilles could be getting bored-"<p>

"Oz, do you think Break could have returned to Pandora?" Gilbert asked, as he gripped his gun in his left hand as they rounded a corner, revealing nothing more than a long stretch of an empty corridor in front of them. "Or do you think the Baskervilles could have…"

"Break's too strong for that Gil," Oz said confidently, although he felt a tinge of unease as the words slipped out of his mouth. _Gil doesn't know Break's blind. What if the Baskervilles had caught him in a weak moment? _"He saved us last time, remember?"

"Oi shorty don't ignore me, even if you're talking about The Xerxes-I mean, Xerxes Break," Elliot all but growled, as he shifted uneasily from one foot to another. He didn't like this. Last time this happened, the Baskervilles had approached shorty directly-why were they playing games now? And they had _dared_ to take Leo. _I won't forgive them. I won't use my sword to hurt them out of blind rage, but I'll drag them to Pandora so they can receive the punishment they deserve. _

_But if they laid one hand on Leo..!_

"Oz. I don't mean to worry you…but have you heard from Ada-sama since yesterday?" Gilbert said, hating himself for asking but the consequences if he didn't…the letter hadn't stated exactly _who_ the Baskervilles had taken.

_Not Ada. Please, please not Ada too._ "I haven't, but Break mentioned she was with Uncle so she's probably fine~" Oz said as casually as he could, feeling Gilbert's worried golden eyes on him. "Anyway," Oz changed the subject smoothly, "Where do you think we should look next? Elliot you know this place best, where do you think the Baskervilles are hiding?"

"If I knew that we wouldn't have wasted two hours looking for them stupid," Elliot pointed out, clueless to what had just happened. "But shorty I've decided. Let's search the ground floor. After the last time you came here, I asked Ernest about the secret passages of Lutwidge Academy, and he said that besides the passages leading in and out of Lutwidge, there was a large cavern built underneath the school, as a sort of underground bunk in case enemies attacked. So let's go check that out shorty, Gilbert." Without waiting for a reply, Elliot strode off, leaving Oz and Gilbert to hurry after him.

* * *

><p>Elliot had been right.<p>

In silence, the trio took in the scene, mentally bracing themselves of what they might find ahead._ Blood. _There were splotches of it on the carpeted floor, ending at a seeming blank wall. But to Elliot, there was something even worse: Leo's glasses were on the floor, the frames shattered. Elliot knelt down to pick them up, his hands barely shaking. _I'll kill them. I won't forgive the Baskervilles._

"Elliot, stay calm." Oz said, placing his hand on the older boy's shoulder, while Gilbert touched parts of the wall, looking how to open the tunnel that was undoubtedly behind it. "The Baskervilles want to frighten us, I doubt they're seriously injured. Leo's glasses could just be an accident-"

"Shut up." Elliot got to his feet, withdrawing his sword from his bag. Normally, holding the cool, sleek instrument that had been entrusted to him by Father-which felt more like an extension of his arm, made Elliot feel calmer. But not now, when things had gone so wrong. "I'm going." Without waiting for a reply, Elliot stepped into the passageway, with Oz and Gil following behind.

As the trio went deeper in, they heard no sound-nor were they ambushed. The path was visible by the oil lamps on the wall so there was no fear of falling over. The déjà vu Oz felt when he was led last time by 'Big Sis' was overwhelming. But Oz would never run-Alice was in danger, and so was Sharon-chan and Leo. Gil needed him by his side too. Oz's eyes flicked over to Gil, who was holding his gun in one hand and his eyes alert and wary for any threats. When Gil's eyes met Oz's own, the blond gave him a reassuring smile. _I'm fine_. This seemed to satisfy the raven, who gave Oz a faint smile back, before focusing on Elliot who was ahead of them.

"Elliot slow down. We should be reaching the end soon, the Baskervilles must have at least stationed a guard to alert them of our coming," Gilbert called out, reaching out and grabbing the young Nightray's arm.

"Good, I want them to know." Nevertheless, Elliot slowed to a halt, adjusting his grip on his sword. In front of him was a dusty oak door built into the wall, where presumably was the room the tunnel ended at.

"Elliot let me go first. You and Oz stay behind me." Gilbert said firmly. He needed to make it clear to Elliot what was going to happen, since he was the only one of the three who had a Chain at his disposal. _For Oz to try and use B-Rabbit's powers here will be too dangerous._

Without waiting for Elliot to agree, Gilbert yanked open the door, gun pointing straight at whatever was behind it.

…Which turned out to be another slightly smaller door.

…Which had a golden star pasted in the centre with the words: _You tried_

"What the hell?" came Elliot's eloquent response, as the trio stared at the door. _That was it? 'You tried?' _Elliot pressed his hand against the door and promptly fell through it into pitch black darkness, since it turned out to be made of _paper_.

"Elliot?!" Oz stepped through the now torn sheet, eyes straining to see in the dark. Sudden death did not fall upon him, so Oz helped Elliot to his feet, while assuring Gilbert they were fine.

"Hands off shorty, I'm fine." Elliot shook Oz off, scowling at their non-existent surroundings. "Where the fuck are the Baskervilles-"

"CUT!" Blinding light filled the room, causing the three to startle (or in Elliot's case curse) and reflexively shield their eyes from the glare. Nevertheless they could hear many people talking, including some very _familiar_ voices, such as a certain Miss Ojou-sama.

Oz was the first to recover. As he stared around, he realised that they were in the centre of a room very much the same as the Baskerville's one from last time, with crates piled up at the back. The only difference was that the room was filled with familiar faces: Sharon, Break, Uncle Oscar, Ada, Alice, Leo and even Reim. _They're safe,_ was Oz's immediate thought, even as Uncle Oscar rushed forward, looking worried.

"Look Xerxes, I told you this was a bad idea from the start." Oscar said as he glanced over Gilbert (who was mute from shock) and Oz to make sure neither of them was hurt. Elliot on the other hand was sputtering in bewilderment. _Where the hell were the Baskervilles? Had Xerxes Break driven them away already? But there had been _blood_ on the floor, and Leo, Sharon Rainsworth and that Alice girl didn't look the slightest harmed. Sure he was glad Leo was safe but nothing, _nothing_ was making sense._

"That's a harsh statement~ After all it was my lady who organised all this-"

"Ahem!" Sharon broke in, frowning as she leafed through what seemed like notes? A script? to Oz. "Dear me, did you have to use that word Elliot-sama? It really is undignified and ruins the romantic ending…"

"Ex-excuse me?" Elliot was _lost_. "What do you mean by 'romantic' ending? I rushed here because the Baskervilles had kidnapped Leo-"

"See, that is exactly what I meant," Sharon sighed happily, her eyes taking a dreamy look. "The headstrong master dropping whatever he was doing the instant he heard that his loyal valet was in danger, going through a perilous journey against all odds to save his valet…the looks of anger and despair his expression beheld when he discovered his valet had been harmed! The determination his gaze beheld..! Wouldn't anyone with a sense of taste call that romantic?" Sharon continued happily, unaware by the fact that all the males near her (Break and Reim) were inching cautiously away. Indeed, Break was holding out Emily as though she was some kind of offering, to protect him from the ever-changing mood of his lady. "And thanks to Grandmother's foresight we got everything recorded on tape too so we can re-watch it over and over again~"

Forget being lost, Elliot was completely at sea by now. It wasn't helping that shorty had just seemed to have taken this in stride, and was talking avidly to Ada Vessalius and Alice now. Gilbert was well, being a usual waste of space which was his default condition.

"What about the blood on the floor?" The young Nightray sputtered out. "How do you explain _that_?"

"That was Ada-sama's doing," Sharon said, wishing she had a cup of tea to sip. Really, it couldn't be healthy staying here in Lutwidge's dusty cellars for too long. "When we were looking for props, Ada-sama told us that the Drama Club here had various substitutes for blood, which we decided was both the easiest and fastest way to convince you."

"_Drama club?_" What was Sharon Rainsworth going on about? Was she messing with him on purpose? They were talking about the Baskervilles here, not some kind of stupid farce!

_Say whatever you want about Elliot Nightray being noble Oz-kun, but he really is thick. _Break mused, who was feeling disgruntled after Reim had confiscated his candy (because 'it's unhealthy' or it's 'you need to have a balanced diet Xerxes not just candy to rot your teeth!') _Bleh_. "Elliot-kun," Break drawled, "Do you still not understand? Let me spell it out for you then~ The 'kipnapping' was set up by my lady on suggestion from Sheryl-sama, who said it would be a memorable way for everyone to relax. There are no Baskervilles involved~"

"…You mean this was for all your own sick amusement?" Elliot turned appalled to his servant, who was leaning against a corner of a wall, reading. Leo wasn't even bothering to try and defend his master either! "Leo you just went along with it? Do you have any idea how _worried_ I was? AND ALL OF YOU JUST PLAYED ALONG-"

"Oh stuff it Elliot," Oz said loudly. "Here's one of Ada's cats Snowdrop, pet her." Now that Elliot was preoccupied (he couldn't hit Oz or yell loudly least he scared the innocent ball of fluff in his hands which was purring contentedly) Oz went to Gilbert's side to prod him back to life. "See Gil, everything worked out fine. Now get up off the floor already least people think I bully you Gilllll~"

"I'm never going to raise a finger to help shorty or anyone else again," Elliot muttered to himself, even as he stared into those round sympathetic eyes. _That includes Leo, he can jolly well rescue himself. _The young Nightray tried unsuccessfully to glower at the cat, but failed miserably at the tiny mewing sounds Snowdrop made as the cat rubbed its head against Elliot's hand. "Hmph. So you remember me do you?" Elliot stroked the soft fur, smiling, unaware of Leo coming up to him and squatting down beside him.

"Elliot, stop thinking dirty thoughts about the poor cat."

"I'm not!" Elliot put down Snowdrop to better glare at the noirette._ Since when did Leo buy a spare pair of glasses? I only bought him one. _"And coming from the person who spends his time reading _porn_, it-"

"You mustn't say such things in the presence of Lady Rainsworth Elliot," was Leo's finishing words as he punched Elliot squarely in the face.

Sharon on the other hand, was trying her best not to squeal. Only the thought of decorum as a Rainsworth lady before other members of a different dukedom saved her. A real life tsundere right before her eyes! She would have to commemorate this day.

"Oscar-sama, Sharon-sama," Reim said, as he shuffled his feet, sweat-dropping as he watched Sharon's reactions to Elliot Nightray and his servant. Reim wasn't exactly sure he himself approved of the methods Sharon had used to get everyone to relax. Not that it wasn't nice to be able to take a break for once, but it went against his moral code. "Isn't it almost time now?"

"Thanks for reminding me Reim-san," Sharon said graciously as she whispered Eques's name, preparing to transport everyone. "Everyone, it's time for the second surprise now! Please do not be alarmed as I will be using Eques to transport us to save us the long walk."

"God spare us-"

"_Shut up_, Elliot."

"…Tch. What's the surprise shorty?" Elliot shouted over to the blond, seconds before shadows began shifting under their feet, blurrily taking the form of a unicorn.

"A party of course!"


	13. 自作自受

**Chapter 13: ****自作自****受**

* * *

><p>"…I don't believe this." Elliot clenched the glass of 'juice' he was holding in his right hand, as he stared, with Leo trying to hide his giggles behind his hand. <em>Giggling!<em>

The party which had started off innocently enough, had turned into a ….Elliot couldn't find a good enough word to describe his feelings. Well actually he _could_, but Leo who seemed a goddamn mind reader these days would smack him on his head, and Elliot's pride was feeling sore enough already. First of all: Everyone he knew (shorty's friends, shorty's family, the Rainsworths, some of Pandora's staff, even the Barmas) had been invited. That was an insult in itself. Where were the Nightrays? Even if Mother and Father were too busy, his brothers, his sister! Sure they might turn down the offer (or only Vanessa would come to save her dear brother Elly from corrupting influences), but for Oscar Vessalius and Co to not even send an invitation!

"Elliot, you're going to shatter the glass from your grip."

"Thanks for pointing out the obvious Leo," Elliot shot back, eyes narrowing when he spotted Oz who obviously had taken more 'juice' than he should have, boasting to everyone within earshot how he had fearlessly led the rescue team, how Gilbert and Elliot had depended on him to clear their doubts and fears, at least before Xerxes Break threw a cake at him.

Leo opened his mouth to speak, but closed it silently as he watched Elliot grumble something about disrespecting Nightray's honour, before the young Nightray tipped his head back to drink the wine Oscar Vessalius had provided.

"…Oi Leo," Elliot said, wiping his mouth with his sleeve. God, he never understood why his brothers and father drank at least one glass of wine every meal time. The wine tasted foul, even though it did take some bitterness Elliot felt off. Maybe Ernest was right, you grew into wine. Or something like that, considering Ernest himself had been half-drunk at the time and was flirting with other noble women at the same time, which eventually caused Vanessa to storm in and box his ears. "Why did you go along with smashing the glasses I bought for you? They were a gift you bloody well knew that. And when did you get a replacement without asking my permission?! Aren't you my servant?" Elliot trailed off, choosing to take another gulp of wine. Why did he feel so…weirdly embarrassed-angry? It was stupid to be thinking over this. It was only a pair of glasses.

Leo tapped his fingers against the table, fingers tracing a pattern on an old tea stain on the tablecloth. _Well, what to say to that? _"I would never smash the glasses you gave me when I agreed to become your servant Elliot. The ones you found were produced from Sharon Rainsworth. So Elliot-" Leo reached forward, removing the wine glass from Elliot's hand so he could squeeze it. It was a pity Elliot's gloves got in the way, but his master would probably consider this too corny anyway. "Don't ever worry about me."

"…Bullshit." Elliot mumbled, his hand limp in Leo's. "You can't even defend yourself, your shooting is horrible."

Leo snickered. "Remember the first time you gave it to me and I tried using it?" Leo said, withdrawing his hand from Elliot's allegedly in favour of pushing up his glasses which was slipping down his nose, but really to hide his smirk.

"Yeah, you pointed it straight at my head and said 'Like this?' You're soooo lucky none of my family was around, they would have sent you straight back to the orphanage." Elliot got up, clicking his tongue in annoyance at the headache he felt coming on. He hadn't even drunk _that_ much, god forbid the shorty see this and call him a lightweight like he did all the time with Gilbert.

"Ohhh~ So I should go down on my knees and thank my merciful master for not telling his family?" the noirette teased, going over to Elliot's side. "The sofa there is unoccupied, let's rest awhile before going back to our room." Leo raised his voice, mainly because Alice (who was drunk) was arguing with Gilbert (amazing not too drunk _yet_) over something.

"…You're reading too many trashy romance novels."

* * *

><p>"Oi Shheweed head, let me eat in peace," Alice all but drunkenly growled, grabbing the plate of roast chicken that the raven had taken away from her by force. <em>Didn't Seaweed Head have anything better to do than eye her meat?<em>

"Stupid rabbit, it's drenched in _wine, _you can't eat it." Gilbert said back, yanking the plate back. When the party had just started, Break had walked by and 'accidentally' knocked a bottle of wine he was pouring into a glass right into the pile of food on Alice's plate. Since the brunette refused to waste food, she had continued eating while Gilbert was otherwise occupied.

"Bah!" Alice spat at Gil, kicking him in the stomach, clutching the plate to her chest and her hair was all but bristling. "It's mine! It-" Alice's intoxicated mind saw a way to rub salt in the raven's wound further, "It tastes even better than your tasteless cooking!"

"…That was mean of Alice…" Oz said to Sharon, where they were relaxing on a loveseat with Break behind them. (This had not escaped the attention of Break, whose snickering had caused some askance glances from Sharon.)

"What do you expect Oz-kun? You had to pick two lightweights to be your overage l-" Thankfully Break was saved from getting hit by Sharon's harisen by a sob coming from a certain raven.

"How could you..!" Gil choked in disbelief, the tears influenced by the _one_ cup of liquor he had welling up and dripping down his cheeks despite himself. The stupid rabbit had said his cooking was the best she had tasted hadn't she?! And now-! Alice said that _market-bought food _was better than his! The sound of clicking from Sharon's camera as she delightedly took his teary face didn't help Gilbert's self-confidence either. Gilbert's legs wobbled as he lurched forward in Alice's direction, looking like the poster boy for Lutwidge's 'unknown' paedophile.

"Oz-kun." Break propped himself onto the edge of the loveseat, leaning over to whisper into Oz's ear as a thump signalled the raven collapsing onto the floor. "I'm getting a sense of déjà vu here…"

"Gil just can't hold his liquor…" Oz rose up, walking over to the fallen raven. _How had Gil survived the ten years Oz had been trapped in the Abyss? Surely Pandora must have hosted drinking parties every now and then. At the very least Gil must have had to go to bars to stake out someone suspicious like Edgar did in Volume VII Part B of Holy Knight_!

"I can't move my legs…" Gil whimpered on the floor, his legs twitching as he struggled to move, successfully managing to look like some kind of drunken spider. "I-I'm shrry stupid rabbit," Gilbert hiccupped as he tried to get to his feet, only to tumble down again. "C-cooking ish the only thing I'm good at, but I-I can't even meet your standards..._ouch!_ Y-young master…?" the raven stammered, his eyes meeting Oz's, who had just hit him on the head.

_"How wimpy can you get Gil. _And don't call me by that title its embarrassing!" Oz said, dragging Gilbert up, dusting him off. Oz shivered involuntarily as the speed of the clicking behind them sped up, before flinching as a hand landed on his shoulder.

"Whatcha you both doing?" Oscar laughed, as he clapped the two of them on the back, having taken a few too many sips of wine himself. "Oh Gil, you must really learn to hold your liquor. You're not considered a proper adult until you do so, understand?"

"Boku…Ore..?" the raven sniffed, barely registering Oscar being there. Having people like Oz and Oscar-sama in his life being manly and charming and perfect in so many ways…no, they were _perfection_. They would always be role models to him…

"Sayyy Oz, Gil. I found something that I thought you might be interested in hearing." The Vessalius fished out a crumpled piece of paper from his breast pocket, smoothing it out while still having his other arm secured tightly around Oz and Gil, just in case they made a run for it. "It's something I found in your room after making sure Ada was safe from _corrupting influences._" Oscar left out the part that when he had returned from Pandora, he had thoroughly scouted Lutwidge Academy from top to bottom with one of the convenient swords that they hung on the words for a certain bi-coloured eyed blond. "I printed several. Let's see…ah here's a short one of you and Gil." And since Oscar couldn't find Vincent, the only thing to do that would vent his annoyance was to torment his dearest brother-in platonic ways of course.

"Uncle…" Oz had a very good idea what his Uncle was talking about. Reading fanfiction in private was fine, especially if he could embarrass Gil later. _Not_ when Break was in the same room. Oz could hear munching sounds-_was Break eating popcorn?! _"Don't!"

_"Young master Oz I am home now. And I am looking _so_ badass with my shirt off."_

_"Oooh Mister Gil oooh~~~~"_

Oz covered his face with his hands. What he would give to be drunk like Gil. Even Alice was focusing on them now, her satay half-way to her mouth, forgotten. And for Uncle Oscar to say it in _that_ tone of voice which conveyed the message that Oz was a wilting maiden that needed to be saved from a Big Bad, well Oz wasn't going to be able show his face in public after this.

_"Your scar Gil oohh" _Cue Break going into choked snickers as he covered his mouth with his sleeve.

_"Gil let's do it here and now~" _Oscar raised the piece of paper to allow everyone to see that under the words was a badly printed drawing of Gilbert holding Oz, complete with noodle arms.

_"Yes. And I will leave my hat on." _By now, Sharon was holding a handkerchief to her face, to muffle her squeals.

_"At Pandora-Chains appearing, Sharon Rainworth swooning." _Sharon was wondering by now whether she knew the person who had written this.

_"Elsewhere-Glen was getting head" _

_"It was all a dream"_

_"The end"_

"I'm not quite sure who this Glen person is, but I thought it was a charming little tale," Oscar continued, even as Gil was being bitch-slapped awake by Oz to witness.

"Now," the Vessalius said, releasing Oz and Gil from his hold, "I have several more that I printed out, but I'm afraid that since Lady Sharon is here it's not entirely appropriate..."_ Thank God,_ Oz thought, drooping on the floor in relief. The blond couldn't help but notice that Sharon was looking put out at this, even as she was giving Break a meaningful Look who was rolling on the floor.

"However! I treat Oz and Gilbert as my own flesh and blood, and it's every parent's duty to embarrass their children. So here's another one! Don't worry to you two, you'll get your turn." Oscar nodded wisely to Elliot and Leo in case they were feeling left out. In the meantime, Oz and Gil were beating a hasty retreat to hide behind Alice.

"Ahem!" Oscar cleared his throat loudly, while the rest braced themselves. "Alice-kun was racing down the winding corridors of Pandora. She had left Lady Sharon's company as she had felt Oz calling her, only to happen upon an obscene act that would scar her innocent meat-loving life forever: The candy clown, also known as Xerxes Break, was performing an M-Rated 21 cicada block on Gil and Oz. To be fair, Break was actually doing it on Oz only, since Gil was cowering behind Oz while waving a little white flag.

"Seeing Oz and Seaweed Head were in danger, Alice swung into action: She kicked Break squarely between the legs throwing him by brute force aside, tossed the master and servant pair into her arms bridal-style, and rode off heroically into the sunset on Equus, leaving the old man with his creepy doll alone and broken doomed to a life of dying slowly from obesity due to eating too much cake. Oz and Gilbert were so grateful for Alice to rescue their unworthy selves that they knelt down and kissed her feet, swearing to bring her meat as soon as they had hot sweaty buttsex to get rid of their pent-up for ten minutes hormones-"

"What _are_ all of you up to? Sheryl is waiting!" Duke Barma huffed as he stalked into the room, fanning himself furiously with his trustworthy harisen. _Ugh. The heat from summer is unbearable even inside Pandora for my hair. I'll need to stock up on L'Oreal. Rufus smirked, flipping his hair which gave its obligatory bishouen sparkle._

"Cockblocked by Duke Barma…! I refuse to accept this…" Sharon mumbled, clenching her hands into her dress, before flushing a deep red at the un-lady words she had uttered.

"I'll have to agree with the bird-brained duke this time around. We mustn't keep Sheryl-sama waiting." Break sat up, licking his fingers to get the very last of the sugar off it. "Ahhh, but why does Sheryl-sama want to see us in the first place now that the party is over? It must be because she's so tired of listening to you blathering lovesick nonsense Duke Barma ouch!" The albino yelped, receiving a hit from Reim who had crept inside the room after Duke Barma. Unfinished paperwork _hurt._

"Sheryl does not wish to see you Mad Hatter. Nor even her own granddaughter…she wishes to see only the Vessalius boy and his servant, the Black Rabbit, the young Nightray and his servant." Rufus's gaze swept distastefully over the scene, eyes lying on Elliot (who was resting his head on Leo's lap where he was lying on the sofa). "Hurry up and do not waste anymore of Sheryl's precious time."

"Okay, okay we're going." Oz helped Leo push Elliot out of the door while Alice played with Gil's jacket strings.

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><p>"Lady Sheryl…you wanted to see us?" Gilbert timidly ventured, taking off his hat to show respect to the elderly Rainsworth and to hopefully hide his shaking hands. <em>Sheryl-sama couldn't have just wanted to see us for no reason god what does she want with us is it just me or is it suspicious that the only girl here is Alice oh god it's Armageddon.<em>

"Take a seat, take a seat first everyone~" Sheryl shifted aside the paperwork she had been working on, eyes trailing over the five, half which were still under the effects of alcohol. How to put it? "It has come to my ears that, beginning with Elliot-kun, some of you have recently been reading some works of fiction that are meant for adults. Now, do not mistake me, I did not ask for you to talk about embarrassing things like that~" Sheryl paused here, her twinkling eyes examining her audience.

"While Elliot-kun and his servant should be fine, as my granddaughter assures me that they are _flamboyantly_ gay-pardon me, deeply in love with each other-I am more concerned about Oz-kun and company. Such things may distract you from your goal to find Alice-san's memories for example…it worries me greatly."

"…" _What the hell do I say to that!_ Gilbert wanted to kick himself for ending up in such an awkward conversation. It was nearly as embarrassing as the time a few months before Oz's coming-of-age ceremony Oscar-sama had decided he and Oz were ready for the Grown Up Talk. _Oscar-sama probably knew I had feelings for Oz even by then…was I really that obvious…Ada-sama probably knows too…I'm such a failure…_Gilbert sniffed, indulging in a bit of self-pity before Oz socketed him in the side, giving him a glance that clearly said that drunken or not, Gilbert better suck it up and not shrink in the face of oppression.

"Sheryl-sama...please do not worry." Oz spoke up, inwardly what was Sheryl's motive_. She couldn't be hinting towards Alice being a Chain and all, could she?_ "Nothing has changed between me, Alice and Gil…we've only become closer and more understanding of each other." Oz levelly met Sheryl's eyes, not flinching.

A moment passed. Then-

"Fu fu fu, no need to show that unpleasant face Oz-kun~ I just wouldn't want a repeat of what happened with your uncle and his wife to happen with Alice-san~"

"I totally understand Sheryl-sama~ Byyyy the way, did Break put you up to this?" _What did she mean by uncle and his wife?_

"Me, obey Xerx-kun? Fu fu~ Xerx-kun would never let me live it down~ And Ru-kun would bother me even more too~" Sheryl cheerfully said, taking out her harisen reminiscently.

"I bet…"

"Wait…! And you stop sniffing me!" Elliot said, bristling at the brunette. Alice harrumphed at that, opening her mouth to tell Elliot exactly what she thought of him before stiffening in surprise as Gil hastily began petting her head to keep her content.

"How did you know about those fanfics?" Elliot asked. Damn his head was throbbing even worse now. At least he wasn't stuttering or crying like Gilbert.

"Oh? Sharon-chan introduced them to me~ A few months ago she mentioned that after reading the latest volume of Lady Sylvie and Her Mongrels she felt inspired to try writing, since there was such copious amounts of material around her to draw inspiration from. Fufu, let me thank you both. Sharon-chan says you two have been a great inspiration for her writing, please continue with the adorable tsun master and servant act~ Now I'm sure you have better things to do with your time than entertain an old lady~ But before you go, I have a few presents for you~" Sheryl handed them several rectangular presents covered in the Janta-doll wrapping paper before dismissing everyone.

"I should have known from the start Sharon Rainsworth was behind all this. Doesn't she have anything better to do with her time then sip tea and make other people's lives miserable!" Elliot vehemently said as soon as the group was a safe distance away.

"You're exaggerating Elliot. Sharon-chan doesn't mean any harm. What do you think is inside these presents?" Oz turned his present over and shook it.

"Nothing good that's for sure…" Gilbert mumbled, swaying as he walked. _Should I smoke now or not? But if I do, Oz will tease me and Elliot will hit and shout at me…_

"On the contrary, Sheryl-sama gave us Education~" Leo held up his present which he had already unwrapped, showing a doujinshi which had a picture of Elliot and Leo holding hands (Elliot looking appropriately tsundere) with the words Elly/Leo R-18 below in pink floaty text~

There was a moment of silence where everyone looked down at their gift.

"OZ..!" Gilbert screeched as Oz tore off the wrapping paper, to unveil an Oz/Gil doujinshi. "Where did Sheryl-sama get all this?"

Leo tugged at Elliot's arm. "Come Elliot we have books to bond over~" Leo took Elliot's hand and prised the Nightray's gift away just in case Elliot did something stupid like hack it into pieces with his sword. "Bye Oz-kun, Alice-kun and Gilbert-kun~ Have fun~" Leo waved cheerfully at them before dragging off Elliot who looked grim as he contemplated the immediately future before him.

"What did the stupid rabbit get…She's not old enough to see this…" Oz sweat-dropped when he realised the truth in Gil's words. "Alice, what doujinshi did you get?"

"It's a book like the one that woman showed me before. It's called Lady Sylvie Guide to Educating Your Mongrel!" Alice bit her book, nibbling it. For some reason it smelt like it had been drenched in perfume. There was also a little note on the front where Sheryl had written in cursive writing "I have a sense you may need this~ Feel free to approach me or Sharon-chan if you do not understand fully~"

"…Let's burn that book." Oz said, as the trio begun walking back to their rooms.

"...You're one to talk Oz."

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><p>AN: The title for this chapter (自作自受) means to suffer from one's own actions in Chinese (You know, the saying you laid your bed now you have to lie on it. Oryouknowitcouldbechangedtof uckforElliotandLeocoughcough ) And can I just say I have a headcanon of Rufus learning how to tap-dance perfectly because Sheryl wanted him to learn how to do so back when they were younger. The epilogue should be up within a few days~<p> 


	14. Stories

"_I feel so warm. I understand that this peaceful time won't last for long. But I can't help but wish that this dreamlike moment…_would last forever_."_ Oz–Retrace XLVII-Unbirthday

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><p><strong>Epilogue: Stories <strong>

"Things seem kind of dull now, don't you agree Gil, Alice?"

"You're kidding me Oz. Oi Alice, stop doing that!" Gilbert was trying to smoke in peace while Alice was trying to yank the cigarette stick out of his mouth.

"Nice try Seaweed Head! This is exactly the kind of self-destructive behaviour that fanfic was talking about that I have stop you from doing!" Alice made another grab for the cigarette, almost succeeding as Gilbert sputtered in distress. "What? Oz why did you give something like that for the stupid rabbit to read!"

"I didn't Gil!" Oz huffed, even as he flicked through a certain Oz/Gil doujinshi, approving of the way the artist had drawn him in absolute charge. His eyes weren't that big though... "Sharon-chan said that she was practising more on her writing…so she asked me and Alice to proofread. And besides, it's all fluff Gil, nothing dirty-minded like you're thinking right now~"

"I-I am _not_ thinking wrong Oz! Stupid rabbit now's not the time!" The raven flicked Alice on the forehead, as her newest attempt to get the cancer stick had scratched him. The brunette promptly bit him, causing Gil to yelp in an undignified manner.

_How is he doing all this without dropping that stick! It must be what my meat is to me…This calls for my secret weapon that Sharon told me to use in desperate times._ Alice grabbed Gilbert's face with her hands while clambering onto his legs for grip, leaning forward to bite his cheek and then making her way down to the raven's lips to lightly nibble them as a distraction. This of course led to the raven being stunned into numbness for a few seconds, which was enough time for Alice to triumphantly snatch the cigarette from Gilbert's lips and to escape.

"…! Stupid rabbit! You can't just go around doing that..!"

_Good work Alice._ "Ehhh Gil, I'm feeling hungry! Go make me cake~"

"Don't change the subject Oz!"

"Yeah go cook for us Seaweed Head! I want steak, medium raw!" Alice snuggled up to the blond after chucking the cigarette in the bin, pulling the doujinshi over to her side so she could get a better look. "Hey Oz, what are these pointy bits sticking out of you and Seaweed head? They look like sausages…"

"_You two!_ Geez…" **_I'm baby-sitting children…_**

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><p>"<em>So we're to find out more about this Yura guy huh?"<em>

"_Yeah…according to Break, he may know information of where the next sealing stone lies. It may be dangerous-"_

"_You're being stupid Seaweed Head! As long as I'm here, I'll protect my manservants so don't worry! Now pat my head!"_

…

_Stories happen and end all the time. Since my coming-of-age ceremony ten years ago and the Baskervilles alleging to my 'sin', everything seems to be almost neatly slotting into place-as though someone is turning the pages of a book, leading up to this one truth that lies locked in Alice's memories: What happened one hundred years ago, at the centre of Sablier, where Alice and possibly Gil, once lived? _

_To be honest I don't care what truth reveals itself to me. Because, so long Gil and Alice are by my side and I'm not hurting them by not telling them things that they can't-_can_ face- (thank you Elliot) I'll be fine._

_Everything will be fine._

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><p>AN: Well, I've finally reached the end of this fanfic after almost one and a half years! OWO' I feel kind of nostalgic ahahaha *coughs*<p>

I want to thank all of you who read this story and even more so to those who commented on it. You guys made me feel really happy to be able to receive feedback on my story~ In order from the start: **Kyuun, MysteriouslyMystery, Pandora'sDarkDreamer, tamachon, peppermint twertle, Cause theres no hope for Today, Aisu-c0de, AnjuHime, switmikan74, LittleMissPH, Kujo Kasuza Phantomhive, L lawliet vs Kira, Little Leo, LovelyDemon, QuirkyIceHeart, Techie Bunny, nisakeehl, lillymansfield, Lurking In The Deep, DidiMag, tohru15 **and all the anons~ I love every single one of you \OWO\

The last bit is a inner dialogue by Oz. I wanted to try and think from his point of view (accepting what will happen but countered by what Elliot said to him in Lutwidge Academy; and from the very end of Volume 1 where Oz thinks this had to be a ridiculous fairytale written by someone else. _Goddamnit Jun._) I'm not too sure whether Oz's thoughts sounds too OOC though, but I'm satisfied.


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